Marks & Spencer, aka M&S, has pulled on our heartstrings once again this year and delivered the most spectacular spread of Christmas party food.
At this time of year, if it’s not a table full of picky bits, we don’t want it.
We want every single meal presented in buffet format, and every single plate to feature a tiny portion of pastry, something on a cocktail stick, something else on a skewer, something with a piece of fruit jammed on top and some sort of novelty cheese.
Every year the supermarkets clear out space in the fridges for their selection of Christmas party food – but we all know that M&S is king when it comes to completely excessive creations for the festive season.
And the best bit? It’s all priced on a 4-for-3 offer, so you can get a free extra when you buy three items.
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Here are some of the best party food items we found in store.
This is not just any picky tea… this is an M&S picky tea.
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Party food? Sorry, I thought you said pâté food
M&S Christmas food. Credit: The Hoot Leeds
Has Heston Blumenthal got a side-hustle at M&S that he’s not telling us about?
This year’s Christmas party food features duck live parfait cleverly disguised as little clementines – adorable.
And on the same theme as unnecessarily-shaped party food, M&S also has a ‘picture perfect antipasti wreath’, which as far as we can tell is just a normal antipasti platter but in a circle.
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The show-stopping party-winners
You know the sort of family buffet where everyone’s asked to contribute a special item? These are the ones that will get your Aunt Linda absolutely seething with envy.
Imagine being the smug git who rocks up with steamed bao decorated in immaculate reindeer faces, or a cheesy garlic doughball sharer in the shape of a literal Christmas tree?
Not to mention the one M&S picky bit item that set our literal hearts racing – the pulled ham and rarebit crumpets.
Sign us up for those brownie points.
Battered cheese… chedd-are you listening now?
We can all agree that a cheeseboard is one of the best bits of Christmas – but imagine it all being BATTERED.
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M&S has got arancini balls laced with cheddar cheese and a creamy sauce, all rolled up in breadcrumbs, plus halloumi fries with a sweet chilli sip, and even melt-in-the-middle profiteroles made with cheddar instead of cream.
This is how I would like all my profiteroles to be from this day forward thank you.
This is how M&S views a take-away and it is, naturally, *fancy*.
There are teeny chip-shop style sausages in a salt and vinegar batter, with proper chippy curry sauce for dipping.
There’s also spring rolls stuffed with normal burger fillings – British beef, gherkins, and caramelised onions.
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Plus chicken doughnut dippers, which are… well, chicken dippers but round with a hole in the middle.
Nice to meat you
Oh yeah of course M&S has gone extremely high-brow with its charcuterie bits. What did you expect?
You can buy an entire joint of Spanish serrano ham, and just feel like an absolute boss carving tiny slithers off it in its wooden stand and special knife (included).
Or you can cheat a little and buy an entire board, beautifully assembled for you so you just whip the clingfilm off and pretend you’re an Insta-goddess.
And then there are cheeses in the shape of snowflakes. Obviously.
Featured image: The Hoot Leeds
Christmas
Government launches £442m drive to get rough sleepers off streets before Christmas
Emily Sergeant
Prime Minister Andy Burnham has launched a £442m drive to get rough sleepers off the streets before Christmas.
Learning from ‘innovative’ approaches put into place during the pandemic, the Government has announced that new accommodation will be rolled out across England this winter, as well as offering practical help with housing, health, and other needs to support people to build a more stable life for themselves in the future.
The new commitment to offer everyone a route off the streets this Christmas, along with boosted funding, reflect Andy Burnham‘s national drive to make ‘real change’ and get everyone playing their part in ending rough sleeping.
Not only will these plans change the lives of rough sleepers, but it’s also said they will have huge benefits for the country as a whole.
Research from homelessness charity Crisis suggests that by preventing 40,000 people from becoming homeless for a year, taxpayers could save around £370 million.
The Government has launched a £442m drive to get rough sleepers off the streets before Christmas / Credit: Number 10 Press Office | Jon Tyson (via Unsplash)
As well provisions to get people off the streets, and the intensive ‘wraparound’ support, the newly allocated funding will also help local areas deliver more than 1,000 ‘settled’ homes over the next three years, it has been confirmed.
Areas facing the greatest pressures will receive the largest share of support.
Working alongside councils, Mayors will play a leading role in driving local action to end rough sleeping, and will be tasked with making decisions that are right for their communities to deliver help where it’s needed most.
The Prime Minister says he ‘won’t accept’ rough sleeping any longer. He commented: “No one should have to bed down in a doorway or outside a station, but we’ve seen it for so long that it feels like Westminster has started to accept it.
“That’s why my first instruction as Prime Minister was to end rough sleeping, and it’s why today we’re getting started with a national drive to get everyone in for Christmas. We did it in the pandemic, we can do it again. But it needs all of us.
“Government will put the money in, but I’m asking leaders in communities and sectors across society to play their part locally too.
“Let’s get people out the cold, and let’s bring back hope.”
Featured Image – Gary Knight (via Flickr)
Christmas
You can ALREADY book tickets for Greater Manchester’s beloved Santa steam trains this Christmas
Emily Sergeant
Greater Manchester’s beloved Santa steam train rides are back for more festive fun this Christmas, and tickets are already on sale… genuinely.
Sure, it’s literally the middle of August, and we’ve still got the rest of summer, and the small matter of a bank holiday weekend, Halloween, and Bonfire Night to get through first, but East Lancashire Railway (ELR) is already looking ahead to the most magical time of year.
The iconic heritage railway has announced that its hugely-popular ‘Santa Specials’ steam trains are back once again from late November.
The famous festive steam trains have become an essential part of Christmas for many families in the North West.
Santa Specials are your chance to hop on board an old-school steam train and travel through the magical Irwell Valley to make ‘enchanted memories’ that last a lifetime.
You can ALREADY book tickets for Greater Manchester’s beloved Santa steam trains this Christmas / Credit: Darren Robinson Photography (via ELR)
The truly special Christmas day out starts as you make your way through a winter wonderland at Bury Bolton Street Station, and first get to meet some old favourites and new characters – including the magical talking Christmas tree, Mrs Claus, and ELR’s very own Ice Princess – all before before having a singalong with a chorus of musical polar bears.
The festive fun then continues on the Santa Special steam trains themselves – with an 80-minute ‘enchanting voyage’ through the picturesque Greater Manchester countryside.
And, of course, you can expect a special visit from Santa while you’re on board.
After you’ve grabbed a selfie or two with the big man himself, the grown-ups can look forward to mince pies and festive tipples, while little Mancs can enjoy a soft drink, some chocolate, and take a festive-themed activity pack home with them.
Daisy Jackson -
23rd December 2022 
