An infamous rant by Noel Gallagher about how rubbish Christmas is has resurfaced online and just in time for the holidays.
Right on cue, just like that advert with Santa driving the big lorry full of Coca-Cola.
In case you’ve never heard him rip festive fanatics a new one before, the legendary Manc musician pretty much loathes everything about the holiday season – or at least he once did, not that he’s one to dwell on beefs and grievances of any kind…
Speaking in a typically sarcastic Christmas message courtesy of visual arts and electronic outlets 180 Fact, the Oasis songwriter and lead guitarist starts nice and softly by simply stating: “The entire f***ing period is a stain on society – I f***ing hate it with a passion.”
A festive Gallagher grouch, through and through.
As you can see in the full short but not-so-sweet clip above, in which Noel manages to cram in countless gripes against everything from Christmas jingles, jumpers and songs, to even TV adverts, presenters and even the amount of food (what?…), the 57-year-old really isn’t very keen on it at all.
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He even took issue with charity singles like the 1985 ‘We Are the World’ song because god forbid any well-meaning soul embrace the spirit of giving come December.
Every year it rears its end, we particularly enjoy his bizarre tangent about a kid asking for an exotic spider or tree frog. Hyperbole and absurdity, we know, but still cracks us up.
The older Gallagher brother reels off pretty much every negative adjective you can think of for Christmas: “rubbish”, “boring”, “dogsh**” and so on. He even says he has turned his daughter Anais against the holiday and will continue to work on the other family members in the coming years.
Having said that, we’re not too sure how well all that is going or if Noel is still as vehement in his hatred of Christmas as he once was, especially given recent events. This you, mate, yeah?…
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Noel Gallagher hosted a star-studded Christmas party in London on Wednesday night.
The 57-year-old got into the festive spirit by inviting a load of his famous pals to celebrity hangout Chiltern Firehouse, which is frequented by the likes of Kate Moss, Rita Ora and even Tom… pic.twitter.com/0E8EnnXgTg
In all seriousness, we sincerely hope that now Oasis are officially back that Noel and all the other Gallagher family relations will be reunited once again this festive period and that everything will be absolutely hunky dory.
That being said, we’ve already had one early Christmas miracle with the two kissing and making up so we’re not going to push our luck too much because, let’s be honest, if it’s anything like anyone else’s Christmas, they’ll be at each other’s throats before you know it.
Please just stay friends until after the tour’s over, lads, we beg you.
What about you lot? Are you Christmas fans or, like Noel Gallagher, do you think it’s overrated tripe?
Unknown Mortal Orchestra at the Albert Hall Manchester – groovy, hazy and effortlessly cool
Clementine Hall
Unknown Mortal Orchestra at the Albert Hall proved exactly why they’ve built such a cult following over the past decade.
Formed in 2010 by frontman Ruban Nielson, the band first broke through with their scrappy, lo-fi self-titled debut and since then, they’ve become known for their signature blend of psychedelic rock, funk, and warped pop.
I first saw the band back in 2023 at Glastonbury, and yes sorry I am one of those annoying people that bring it up all the time.
They’re the perfect band to close your eyes, sway your head and tap your foot to – and that’s exactly what the crowd were doing in unison last night at the Albert Hall.
Image: The Manc Group
From the second they stepped on stage, there was no rush – just that signature hazy groove met with enough stage lights to sink a ship.
You could barely see them on stage, but that made it even cooler. And you can only imagine how gorgeous the Albert Hall looked with hundreds of spotlights in different colours whizzing all over it.
Early tracks simmered and pulled us in before the band stretched out into crowd pleasers like ‘Multi-Love’ and ‘Hunnybee’. What an absolute tune by the way.
Image: The Manc Group
There wasn’t much crowd interaction but, again, there didn’t need to be. They let the music do the talking and by treating us to some of the most epic guitar solos we’ve ever heard (no, seriously), we’ll forgive them for not talking to us.
Each song melted into each other as the band oozed effortless charm and talent throughout the almost two hour set, which is no mean feat.
Of course, a sea of phones shot up for ‘So Good at Being in Trouble‘, their most popular track which prompted a harmonious audience singalong. Not very harmonious by me, admittedly.
It was a fantastic ending that left the audience feeling united by the laidback brilliance of Unknown Mortal Orchestra, and I hope they don’t leave it too long to come back this time.
Review | Leon Thomas at Manchester Academy – ‘Mutts Don’t Heel’ but this gig healed me
Thomas Melia
American singer-songwriter Leon Thomas visited Manchester Academy last night, performing hits from his deluxe album to a sold-out crowd of more than 2,600.
One year after an exclusive London MUTT Live date, Mr Thomas returns to the UK with the ‘MUTTS DON’T HEEL’ Tour, venturing to five cities, including the music capital of the North: Manchester.
The night started off just how it should’ve done with ‘HEEL’, as the audience were welcomed by the drum-loop and a chill atmosphere from the start.
Now, it wouldn’t be a Leon Thomas gig without at least one Ty Dolla $ign collaboration making the setlist, and there’s plenty to choose from with a new one dropping just over a month ago, ‘miss u 2’.
Leon Thomas performing hits at Manchester Academy (Credit: Audio North)
The funk-influenced musician opted for ‘FAR FETCHED’, and the audience was in the palm of his hand. No matter which of the four link-ups he chose, it was always going to go down well – Manchester never disappoints.
Leon didn’t even have to ask the crowd to bring more energy; they already matched him. When he sings, “For someone who don’t ask for favours, I’ve done way too many favours”, on ‘PARTY FAVORS’, he really meant it.
Last year, Leon Thomas dropped PHOLKS, a project which saw him exploring old-school funk and soul sounds even further and ‘Just How You Are’ had even the shyest dancer pulling out a little two step.
This isn’t the only hit that sent the crowd into a frenzy; ‘Baccarat’ and its impressive psychedelic guitar solo had jaws literally falling to the floor at Manchester Academy.
His songs might not be dramatic or extravagant, but they don’t need to be. Leon’s artistry prevails when he’s softly singing, and you’re still able to detect each instrument.
Leon Thomas brought the MUTTS DON’T HEEL Tour to Manchester Academy (Credit: The Manc)
‘Breaking Point’ is an easy-listening soul track that had all 2,600 Leon Thomas fans in our feelings as we realised we were coming to the end of a phenomenal concert.
And of course, ‘Mutt’ – his biggest single to date: a bouncy and swag-filled number that sticks in your head for weeks on end – sounded even better when backed by a live band as I discovered last night.
There was some insane musicality, distinct bangers and impeccable live arrangements that elevated the original studio recordings. Maybe ‘Mutts Don’t Heel’, but Leon Thomas definitely healed me.
He wasn’t the only cool cat playing last night either:
Danny Jones -
16th December 2024 
