Sandwich Technician
AJ Handley-Rowe -
10th November 2021
AJ Handley-Rowe -
10th November 2021 Internet signals reportedly ‘100x faster on the moon’ than on some UK trains
Danny Jones
Yes, you read that right: according to a recent study, internet signals on some UK trains are currently estimated to be 100x slower than they would be on… wait for it: the actual MOON.
Give us strength – and by that we mean signal strength.
As per new analysis carried out by Good Business Travel (GBT), research into some of the worst-connected train routes across Great Britain has delivered a rather depressing evaluation of our telecommunications systems and railways.
While some may certainly be better than others, it’s fair to say that we’ve all been there; you’re trying to have a call or use even a crumb of your data on a train before you ultimately give up and start arbitrarily looking through your photo library.
Put a man on the moon ✅
— Ellen Pope (@ellenpope) September 16, 2019
Cure diseases ✅
Get wifi on a fucking train. ABSOLUTELY NOT. NOOOO WAYYYYYY.
As damning and hyperbolic a claim as it might sound, GBT have indeed found that when compared against Ofcom’s benchmark for reliable internet performance (5Mbit/s), not a single train journey consistently meets the regulator’s standard.
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Anyone who’s ever done Manchester to London and vice versa will know all too well how frustrating it can be to get a steady signal during your journey.
Never mind, eh? You know, they’re only two of the most modern and digitally-driven cities in the entire country – foolish of us to expect the key North-South link would carry over to internet connection.
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For those wanting to see the wider context, the company used figures from ScienceABC findings published in June 2026.
Regarding train WiFi, hit and miss is putting it mildly, and even if you’re lucky enough to be on one that actually has a decent signal, it’s only a matter of time before the carriages fill up and throttle everyone’s connection, and it becomes patchy at best.
In what might be one of the slightest consolations ever, you’ll be glad to hear the LDN-MCR speeds are only the seventh worst in the nation, managing just 16% when it came to the average mobile network ‘Good Performance’ by Ofcom standards. You can see the unwanted top 10 leaderboard in full below.
The worst UK train journeys for mobile connectivity
| Rank | Route | Average mobile network Good Performance (Ofcom) |
| 1 | Basingstoke to Coventry | 6% |
| 2 | Sheffield to Doncaster | 12% |
| 3 | Taunton to Leeds | 13% |
| 4 | London to Edinburgh | 14% |
| 5 | London to East Midlands Parkway | 14% |
| 6 | Bedford to London St Pancras Peak | 15% |
| 7 | London to Manchester | 16% |
| 8 | London to Glasgow | 18% |
| 9 | London to Plymouth | 24% |
| 10 | London to Bournemouth | 25% |
Put simply, a staggering number of domestic train journeys fail the litmus test for what would be considered even a decent connection.
It’s got to the point now that there are even people starting nationwide campaigns to help generate awareness around upgrading telecoms infrastructure across the UK, with trains being one of the biggest challenges in this country.
Speaking on the report, Good Business Travel’s Client Experience Director, Natasha Inglis, said in a statement: “Millions of people travel by train every week expecting to work, stream, message friends or simply stay connected.
“Instead, they’re met with frozen video calls, emails that won’t send and endless buffering. While improvements to Britain’s rail connectivity have been promised by the government, passengers still have to deal with unreliable coverage every day. There are a few tricks that can help in the meantime.
“Many people don’t realise that sitting on the side of the train facing nearby towns or major roads can improve your signal because you’re closer to mobile masts. It’s also worth switching your phone to 4G instead of allowing it to constantly search for weak 5G signals, which often makes connectivity even less reliable on moving trains.”
But hey, things are slowly getting better if reports are to be believed, with satellite-enabled mobile services gradually being rolled out, meaning traditional ‘deadzones’/signal blackspots may not be as big of a problem as they once were. Touch wood.
For now, we’re just going to keep making sure we’ve got a decent book with us and enjoy taking a break from endless screentime.
Read more:
- Argentina to be fined by FIFA for controversial Falklands flag after semi-final v England
- Greater Manchester council bans BBQs, fireworks and more at local attraction after moors fires
- Thomas Tuchel quote from early interview as England manager comes back to haunt him
For all the latest news, events and goings on in Greater Manchester, subscribe to The Manc newsletter HERE.
Featured Images — Anna Shvets (via Pexels)/NASA Johnson (via Flickr)
Inside the stunning £1.4m Stockport countryside Georgian manor house that’s now BACK on the market
Emily Sergeant
Fancy a look inside a Grade II-listed Georgian manor house that’s now back on the market in the stunning Stockport countryside?
The only thing is, you’ll just need the small matter of £1.4 million before you can call it yours.
Of course, it goes without saying that the vast majority of people reading this article won’t have £1.4 million just sitting in their bank accounts right now, but if like us, you love looking at houses you can’t afford in places you’ll probably never live, then allow us to introduce you to this absolute beauty.
Take a look behind the grand front door of what is, by far, one of the finest properties the Greater Manchester housing market has to offer at the moment.
This is Strawberry Hill.
And can you believe it’s only in Stockport?
Well, Marple shall we say, which is very much one of the borough’s most sought-after and affluent residential areas, combining the best of semi-rural living with easy access to all the amenities in the town’s centre, as well as Manchester being not far off either, so it’s ideally placed for peace and quiet yet modern life is within reaching distance.
Steeped in history, Strawberry Hill dates back to the 18th century and estate agents describe it as being a ‘fine example’ of Georgian architecture.
The property was once home to prominent local mill manager Edwin Furness, and is known for having played a role in Marple’s rich heritage – with its original sash windows, grand entrance hall with a semi-elliptical overlight, period features, and older adjoining wing all being a carefully-preserved to keep its timeless charm intact.
Despite this being a historic home and a well-known local landmark though, once you step through the front door, you’ll see that the property has been modernised to a very high standard by the current owners and is a true testament to their eye for design.
Every corner of this stunning home is flooded with natural light, and most rooms boast open fireplaces, classic sash windows, and opulent furnishings to enhance all its grandeur and warmth.
The property also boasts a barn attached to the main living quarters, providing plenty of potential for renovations by the new owners.
And when you step outside, the property only continues to impress.
Not only does the property benefit from being beautifully-positioned in an elevated setting above the River Goyt, but it’s enjoys fantastic views thanks to being surrounded by picturesque countryside, with the river flowing to the west and rolling fields, woodland, and gardens all enveloping the estate.
Read more:
- This stunning manor house surrounded by countryside is on the market for £1.6m… and it’s only in Stockport
- UK’s most popular commuter towns named and four are in Greater Manchester
- Local suburb named one of the UK’s ‘happiest’ places to live
Strawberry Hill is currently on the market with New Mills-based estate agents, PSR, for a Guide Price of £1.4 million, and if you fancy taking a closer look, then you can contact the property company to arrange a viewing.
Or you could just take the cheaper route instead and have a nosy on Rightmove here.
Featured Image – PSR
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