In case you didn’t already know, there’s a Manchester Facebook group dedicated to immortalising stupid comments overheard in the Northern Quarter, and it’s completely hilarious.
Whilst we don’t really have that much time for Facebook nowadays, this community group is so funny that it’s worth signing back in for – even if you’ve ditched the platform for good.
Chronicling all of the neighbourhood’s weird, wonderful, banal and basic goings-on, if you’ve ever found yourself wanting a birds-eye view of one of Manchester’s quirkiest neighbourhoods, well, this is it.
From candid pictures and videos of the eccentric characters who line its streets, to amusing observations and surreal conversational snippets, you’ll never see the district in the same light again.
Prepare yourself, though, because it’s about to get a little bit weird.
From a guy who seemingly wanders the streets whispering and clutching a seagull late at night, to a man who pushes his cat in a pram and an owl that gets about perched on a guy’s shoulder, the Northern Quarter is forever full of surprises.
Here are some of our favourite quotes to date:
‘Passing the Mini-Mart, and a young couple ask each other whether it is a cocktail bar.’ – Dan
‘Couple coming out of The Millstone: “My gosh that was like stepping into Bolton!”‘ – Jake
‘”Oooh is that the Trafford Centre?” / “No it’s Affleck’s Palace.”‘ – James
‘”If you drop that pizza I’ll smack you in the face” – 12am outside Black Dog’ – Jessica
‘”I’d be more upset if Dianna was dead” / She is dead…”‘ – Jack-Cameron
“I take a lot of drugs yeah, but I’ve only lost my shoes once” – James
“If it bleeds we can ferment it” – Madeleine
A cat in a parm. / Image: Martin Maddox via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
‘On approach to The Millstone – “Let’s get wrecked in here before we head to The Ivy.” – Danny
‘Guy on the phone near Shudehill: “Mate, what I’m trying to tell you is if you were in the ocean, you’d be king of the ocean.” / A few seconds later: “What I know about the king of the ocean is, the king of the ocean, would come out tonight.” – James
‘”I don’t like Aperol Spritz, it tastes like sadness.” – Thomas Street.’ – Jack
“She didn’t even know what a bottomless brunch was.” – Bella
‘Not overheard but I’ve just walked past a man carrying an owl like a baby.’ – Aims
‘”Man had a cat in a pram though” – Bouncer (photographic evidence of cat in pram available upon request)’ – Jimmy
“I REALLY hope ‘Hipster’ is finally over mate” / Yeah sick of everyone looking like a vintage New York Docker whose trousers shrank in the wash” / Good news for now – but what will replace it?” / “Probably Pets With Pronouns” / “That’s a fucking mint Album Title right there mate” (Pair that looked like musicians – Idle Hands coffee shop) – Chris
Image: Chloe O’Toole via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
Image: Shaun Anthony via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
‘Two lads walking into Oldham Street from the Piccadilly Gardens end on a busy night: Lad 1: If this was a foreign city, and you were walking down here right now, what would you be thinking? Lad 2: Shithole Lad 1: Right!’ – Lucian
‘“I slept with someone with a vajazzle once” / “What was her name?” / “John” – Thomas St just now.’ –Alex
“You shag by the canal, say your goodbyes, then you fuck off” – Chloe
‘Was in Crazy pedros and some lad and his mate sat down and one of them went “bon appe seat”‘ – Matt
Image: Rob Craven via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
The crisp poem. / Image: Rob Halfpenny via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
‘”Girl “Eurgh, he was just some fresh out of the womb child. 18 years old is too young” / Guy ”aren’t you only 20?” / Girl “yeah” / Guy “it hardly makes you a pedophile then”’ – Alex
‘”I hope someone puts something I say on that overheard in northern quarter group one day, that would be jokes.” Wish granted bro.’ – Jacob
Inside the new supersized Zara store that’s just opened in the Trafford Centre
Clementine Hall
The new Zara has finally opened inside the Trafford Centre, and it’s even bigger and better than we could’ve imagined.
Back in April, the shopping centre signed a deal with Inditex for the new supersized Zara store that would occupy its own flagship space on Peel Avenue.
The Spanish fast fashion brand is famed for its affordable trend-led fashions which you’ll find in abundance at the new space which covers over 3,000 square meters across one single level.
It’s the very first concept store of its kind in the UK, featuring technology like you’ve never seen before.
Images: Supplied
Customers can interact with the brand in-store or via zara.com and the Zara app, enabling real-time inventory browsing, quick product location, and online order pickup.
Created by Zara’s Architecture Studio, the space has been redesigned to offer an elevated experience and is absolutely stunning.
Designed to be your personal stylist, the store features a series of interconnected rooms where each showcases its own curated identity – so you don’t have to go far to find the perfect fit.
Images: Supplied
To celebrate the opening, collections have even been advanced to the Trafford Centre before hitting the rails at any other Zara across the country.
From a dedicated shoe room and an adorable baby closet to an exclusive activewear department and fragrance room, there’s literally everything you could ever want to get you kitted out from head to toe.
Say goodbye to queueing with heaps of hangers, because the changing rooms will practically deliver the clothes for you whilst you can fly through the payment process with the 37 assisted-checkouts.
Images: Supplied
Every inch of the customer experience has been made as streamlined as possible, meaning you could be in and out in a matter of minutes without even having to speak to a member of staff.
But of course, there’ll be members of staff on hand wherever you may need from helping you find the perfect size in the changing rooms to assisting you with your returns.
It’s the best Zara we’ve ever stepped foot in, it’s like shopping in a space ship in the best way possible.
Manchester Arndale is slashing prices on food and drink across the shopping centre
Daisy Jackson
Manchester Arndale’s Summer Scran Fest is back – and that means there are some absolute bargains to be had on food and drink right across the shopping centre.
Throughout the month of August, restaurants, cafes and kiosks within Manchester Arndale will be offering some serious offers and deals.
This ranges from 25% off to buy-one-get-one-free deals, plus free meals for kids and plenty more.
Venues taking part in the Summer Scran Fest include Archie’s, Subway, Barburrito, Pizza Hut, HOP Vietnamese, Michaels Coffee House and plenty more.
And the leisure destinations within Manchester Arndale are getting stuck in too – think free drinks, combos and more at venues including King Pins and Urban Playground.
There are plenty of Manchester-born businesses getting involved and offering bargains to us all, like Archie’s giving out free soft serve when you spend £10, Barburrito offering a £10 meal deal (burrito, tortilla chips and a soft drink), and Lazy Sundae giving a free scoop of ice cream with any large drink purchase.
Big brand deals include a £5 meal deal at McDonald’s (4 Chicken McNuggets, Cheese burger or Mayo chicken; fries; and medium cold drink), and 25% off at Pizza Hut.
There’s 20% off at Sides in the Manchester Arndale Summer Scran FestLazy Sundae will do a free ice cream with a large drink purchase
Then there are newcomers to Manchester Arndale taking part in the Summer Scran Fest.
HOP, a new Vietnamese street food venue on Market Street, is doing 25% off, while Michaels Coffee House will knock 15% off their seasonal favourites like an Iced Maple Oat Matcha or an Iced Rose Coconut Matcha.
There’s also a 20% discount at Sides, the chicken shop backed by YouTube sensations Sidemen.
And as for leisure destinations – Urban Playground is doing 18 Holes of putters tech-infused mini golf, plus any three small plates from The Butcher menu for £28.20.
Kind Pins has 20% off food and drink, and Immersive Gamebox will do 20% off plus a free drink when you book a 60 or 30 minute gaming session.
Pick up a voucher booklet in the centre or download your offers from the Manchester Arndale website from 1 August.