In case you didn’t already know, there’s a Manchester Facebook group dedicated to immortalising stupid comments overheard in the Northern Quarter, and it’s completely hilarious.
Whilst we don’t really have that much time for Facebook nowadays, this community group is so funny that it’s worth signing back in for – even if you’ve ditched the platform for good.
Chronicling all of the neighbourhood’s weird, wonderful, banal and basic goings-on, if you’ve ever found yourself wanting a birds-eye view of one of Manchester’s quirkiest neighbourhoods, well, this is it.
From candid pictures and videos of the eccentric characters who line its streets, to amusing observations and surreal conversational snippets, you’ll never see the district in the same light again.
Prepare yourself, though, because it’s about to get a little bit weird.
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From a guy who seemingly wanders the streets whispering and clutching a seagull late at night, to a man who pushes his cat in a pram and an owl that gets about perched on a guy’s shoulder, the Northern Quarter is forever full of surprises.
Here are some of our favourite quotes to date:
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‘Passing the Mini-Mart, and a young couple ask each other whether it is a cocktail bar.’ – Dan
‘Couple coming out of The Millstone: “My gosh that was like stepping into Bolton!”‘ – Jake
‘”Oooh is that the Trafford Centre?” / “No it’s Affleck’s Palace.”‘ – James
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‘”If you drop that pizza I’ll smack you in the face” – 12am outside Black Dog’ – Jessica
‘”I’d be more upset if Dianna was dead” / She is dead…”‘ – Jack-Cameron
“I take a lot of drugs yeah, but I’ve only lost my shoes once” – James
“If it bleeds we can ferment it” – Madeleine
A cat in a parm. / Image: Martin Maddox via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
‘On approach to The Millstone – “Let’s get wrecked in here before we head to The Ivy.” – Danny
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‘Guy on the phone near Shudehill: “Mate, what I’m trying to tell you is if you were in the ocean, you’d be king of the ocean.” / A few seconds later: “What I know about the king of the ocean is, the king of the ocean, would come out tonight.” – James
‘”I don’t like Aperol Spritz, it tastes like sadness.” – Thomas Street.’ – Jack
“She didn’t even know what a bottomless brunch was.” – Bella
‘Not overheard but I’ve just walked past a man carrying an owl like a baby.’ – Aims
‘”Man had a cat in a pram though” – Bouncer (photographic evidence of cat in pram available upon request)’ – Jimmy
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“I REALLY hope ‘Hipster’ is finally over mate” / Yeah sick of everyone looking like a vintage New York Docker whose trousers shrank in the wash” / Good news for now – but what will replace it?” / “Probably Pets With Pronouns” / “That’s a fucking mint Album Title right there mate” (Pair that looked like musicians – Idle Hands coffee shop) – Chris
Image: Chloe O’Toole via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
Image: Shaun Anthony via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
‘Two lads walking into Oldham Street from the Piccadilly Gardens end on a busy night: Lad 1: If this was a foreign city, and you were walking down here right now, what would you be thinking? Lad 2: Shithole Lad 1: Right!’ – Lucian
‘“I slept with someone with a vajazzle once” / “What was her name?” / “John” – Thomas St just now.’ –Alex
“You shag by the canal, say your goodbyes, then you fuck off” – Chloe
‘Was in Crazy pedros and some lad and his mate sat down and one of them went “bon appe seat”‘ – Matt
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Image: Rob Craven via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
The crisp poem. / Image: Rob Halfpenny via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
‘”Girl “Eurgh, he was just some fresh out of the womb child. 18 years old is too young” / Guy ”aren’t you only 20?” / Girl “yeah” / Guy “it hardly makes you a pedophile then”’ – Alex
‘”I hope someone puts something I say on that overheard in northern quarter group one day, that would be jokes.” Wish granted bro.’ – Jacob
Lemn Sissay OBE pens powerful poem about Manchester City for Black History Month
Danny Jones
Lauded local poet Lemn Sissay MBE has penned a moving poem in collaboration with Manchester City, looking back on the club’s cultural past and key persons of colour for Black History Month.
Born in Orrell in the borough of Wigan, the published author, playwright, and BAFTA-nominated broadcaster has made a name as one of our region’s most notable wordsmiths, so it’s no wonder that he was selected by the Cityzens to touch on this particular topic.
Teaming up not only with Man City but the club’s first-ever Black footballer, Stan Horne, as well as other senior stars from the Maine Road days, all the way up to the modern Etihad era.
‘The Stadium Speaks’ by Lemn Sissay – a poem commissioned by Manchester City for Black History Month 2025
Entitled The Stadium Speaks, the public reading of the verses runs for just under two minutes, but even in the relatively short space of time, there is so much power in this poignant poem.
Roping in help from other past players like Nedum Onuoha, Shaun Wright-Phillips and Shaun Goater, as well as current stars like Ruben Dias, Khadija ‘Bunny’ Shaw and Jeremy Doku, each line leaves just as much impact as the last.
Just as importantly, they were also joined by Jahmal Williams-Thomas, City Matters’ Black and Mixed Heritage representative, Bing Findlater – the Official Supporter Club’s Equality and Inclusion Lead, as well as several other City fans and staff who work throughout the Eithad Campus.
Each individual who lends themselves to the performance delivers their part perfectly and from the heart; after all, Black culture isn’t something strictly celebrated during the month of October, but throughout communities all year round – as it should be.
Sissay, 58, clearly relished the chance to dive into how Greater Manchester‘s history intersects with not only football, but racism, equality, progress and more.
One stands and we all stand One falls and we all fall We are Manchester City And we stand tall
To celebrate Black History Month Manchester City Football Club commissioned me to write this poem to reflect on the club's journey from Maine Road to today. I have called it…
Speaking via a statement on the club website: “Manchester felt like home to me, the moment I stepped foot across the boundary. I came here very early on, when I think I was 13, I came to see Manchester City play. The first time I came to this city was to see City.
“I want the poem to be owned by the person who’s in the stand watching the game. And I wanted the poem to be owned by the person on the pitch who’s playing it. And I want them to feel proud reading it.”
The post goes on to reiterate that just like all teams throughout the football pyramid, racism and discrimination in all its forms should not and WILL not be tolerated.
Asking supporters to step up and speak as and when needed, City fans can report abuse and/or inappropriate behaviour to 07700151894, which will make security aware of what has been witnessed.
Feedback can also be shared anonymously by texting the specific block, row, seat number and a short description of the incident to the number; if in doubt, talk to a steward or police officer at the game.
Elsewhere, the official MCFC Supporter Charter sets out their zero-tolerance policy when it comes to discrimination, and fans can also report online discriminatory abuse they see targeted at Premier League players, managers, coaches, match officials and their families directly HERE.
Legendary musical CATS is coming to Manchester on its UK tour next year
Emily Sergeant
Legendary musical CATS will be taking to the stage here in Manchester next year.
A brand-new production of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s global sensation, CATS, will embark on a major UK tour from summer 2026 following an open-air residency at Regent Park in London – including dates at Manchester’s prestigious Palace Theatre in November.
Based on Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats by T.S. Eliot, with music by Andrew Lloyd Webber, CATS is one of the longest-running shows in West End and Broadway history.
The show originally premiered at the New London Theatre in 1981, where it played for 21 record-breaking years and almost 9,000 performances.
Since its world premiere, the musical has been presented in more than 54 countries, translated into 23 languages, and has been seen by more than 77 million people worldwide – collecting a number of awards along the way.
Legendary musical CATS is coming to Manchester on its UK tour next year / Credit: Feast Creative
This new production of CATS is produced by Regent’s Park Open Air Theatre, with Michael Harrison for Lloyd Webber Harrison Musicals, as part of Drew McOnie’s second season as Artistic Director, and it marks the third Andrew Lloyd Webber title produced by the venue in the last decade.
Unfamiliar with the show? CATS tells the story of the Jellicle cats.
From Euston station to Victoria Grove, the strays and rebels of London gather under the Jellicle moon in the hope they’ll be the chosen one.
With a legendary score featuring well-known songs like Old Deuteronomy, Macavity: The Mystery Cat, TheJellicle Ball, and, of course, the chart-topping hit Memory, this brand-new production of CATS is gearing up to be one of the best theatrical events of 2026.
“I am very excited to see a totally new production of CATS back on the stage where it belongs,” creator Andrew Lloyd Webber said on the show’s return. “I can think of no-one better than Drew McOnie to bring a new vision to the world of the Jellicles.”
Casting and the full creative team is set to be announced in due course, as is the on-sale date and link for tickets, so keep your eyes peeled.