In case you didn’t already know, there’s a Manchester Facebook group dedicated to immortalising stupid comments overheard in the Northern Quarter, and it’s completely hilarious.
Whilst we don’t really have that much time for Facebook nowadays, this community group is so funny that it’s worth signing back in for – even if you’ve ditched the platform for good.
Chronicling all of the neighbourhood’s weird, wonderful, banal and basic goings-on, if you’ve ever found yourself wanting a birds-eye view of one of Manchester’s quirkiest neighbourhoods, well, this is it.
From candid pictures and videos of the eccentric characters who line its streets, to amusing observations and surreal conversational snippets, you’ll never see the district in the same light again.
Prepare yourself, though, because it’s about to get a little bit weird.
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From a guy who seemingly wanders the streets whispering and clutching a seagull late at night, to a man who pushes his cat in a pram and an owl that gets about perched on a guy’s shoulder, the Northern Quarter is forever full of surprises.
Here are some of our favourite quotes to date:
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‘Passing the Mini-Mart, and a young couple ask each other whether it is a cocktail bar.’ – Dan
‘Couple coming out of The Millstone: “My gosh that was like stepping into Bolton!”‘ – Jake
‘”Oooh is that the Trafford Centre?” / “No it’s Affleck’s Palace.”‘ – James
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‘”If you drop that pizza I’ll smack you in the face” – 12am outside Black Dog’ – Jessica
‘”I’d be more upset if Dianna was dead” / She is dead…”‘ – Jack-Cameron
“I take a lot of drugs yeah, but I’ve only lost my shoes once” – James
“If it bleeds we can ferment it” – Madeleine
‘On approach to The Millstone – “Let’s get wrecked in here before we head to The Ivy.” – Danny
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‘Guy on the phone near Shudehill: “Mate, what I’m trying to tell you is if you were in the ocean, you’d be king of the ocean.” / A few seconds later: “What I know about the king of the ocean is, the king of the ocean, would come out tonight.” – James
‘”I don’t like Aperol Spritz, it tastes like sadness.” – Thomas Street.’ – Jack
“She didn’t even know what a bottomless brunch was.” – Bella
‘Not overheard but I’ve just walked past a man carrying an owl like a baby.’ – Aims
‘”Man had a cat in a pram though” – Bouncer (photographic evidence of cat in pram available upon request)’ – Jimmy
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“I REALLY hope ‘Hipster’ is finally over mate” / Yeah sick of everyone looking like a vintage New York Docker whose trousers shrank in the wash” / Good news for now – but what will replace it?” / “Probably Pets With Pronouns” / “That’s a fucking mint Album Title right there mate” (Pair that looked like musicians – Idle Hands coffee shop) – Chris
‘Two lads walking into Oldham Street from the Piccadilly Gardens end on a busy night: Lad 1: If this was a foreign city, and you were walking down here right now, what would you be thinking? Lad 2: Shithole Lad 1: Right!’ – Lucian
‘“I slept with someone with a vajazzle once” / “What was her name?” / “John” – Thomas St just now.’ –Alex
“You shag by the canal, say your goodbyes, then you fuck off” – Chloe
‘Was in Crazy pedros and some lad and his mate sat down and one of them went “bon appe seat”‘ – Matt
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‘”Girl “Eurgh, he was just some fresh out of the womb child. 18 years old is too young” / Guy ”aren’t you only 20?” / Girl “yeah” / Guy “it hardly makes you a pedophile then”’ – Alex
‘”I hope someone puts something I say on that overheard in northern quarter group one day, that would be jokes.” Wish granted bro.’ – Jacob
This Manchester suburb has just been named one of the UK’s ‘happiest’ places to live in 2024
Thomas Melia
An annual poll has named the Manchester suburb of Didsbury spot among 70 locations said to be the ‘happiest’ places to live in the UK.
Greater Manchester has got lots to say for itself, especially with its diverse and unique cultural landscapes, as well as various vibrant communities, so it comes as no surprise that one of our beautiful suburbs has been voted in a list of the UK’s happiest places to live for this year.
The survey included submissions from 5,000 people and there’s a lot of love being shown to the neighbouring areas of Yorkshire like Doncaster, Bingley, and Harrogate – the lattermost placed in second in the entire country.
But, ranking 62nd out of a possible 70 places, the distinct and vibrant area of Didsbury has been noticed by Furniturebox as one of the ‘happiest’ places to live in the UK.
The results took into consideration good state schools, affordable housing, as well as accessibility to pubs, bars, restaurants, independent shops, retailers and more.
With multiple parks, walking destinations, and top-notch travel links with Bee Network trams and buses easily taking you back into the city centre and out to other boroughs, East, West and Didsbury Village all remain some of the most sought-after areas in the region.
There’s a whole host of indie retailers to enjoy, especially on the likes of the main high street and Burton Road, which effectively serves as its own cultural district, home to vintage clothing shops like Steranko, tailored styling opticians Fox Brothers and much more.
Burton Rd also boasts countless fantastic food and drink spots like The Great Kathmandu, SANTÉ, Volta and Proove Pizza, just to name a few; we’ve spent plenty of time just on this stretch of Didsbury alone.
If you’ve spent even a little time in Dids, you’ll know there’s plenty going on and it’s certainly one our happiest places in all of Greater Manchester and therefore the UK.
You can also enjoy the famous ‘Didsbury Dozen’ right on your doorstep.
Elsewhere, and somewhat unsurprisingly, Shakespeare’s ever-romanticised hometown of Stratford-Upon-Avon once again reigned supreme at the top of this list.
That being said, it’s refreshing to see that these locations weren’t entirely related to wealth and similar factors, the survey took affordability into careful consideration.
Cheshire was destined for success with its cracking views and grand properties, as the North West county made waves for the region managing to place in fifth position, holding up against Falmouth in Cornwall which placed in sixth.
Although not nabbing that all-important top spot, Didsbury is carrying the flag for 0161 and showing what all know to be true: Northerners do it best.
Blossoms at O2 Ritz Manchester – five-night hometown residency is already a triumph
Daisy Jackson
Blossoms are a band who were born and forged here in Greater Manchester, and now they’re back retracing their steps with a five-night residency across the venues that launched them into the big leagues.
Their star has risen all the way to arena level and headline shows at Wythenshawe Park at this point, especially here in their hometown, so the chance to see them back in these cosy-ish little venues is special, and a little bizarre.
For night two of their landmark sold-out gig series, it was the turn of the O2 Ritz, that sweaty spot off Oxford Road where the floor bounces downstairs and you stick to the carpets upstairs.
Poetically, the first time I ever saw Blossoms was in this very room in 2016, when they had the mid-afternoon slot at Neighbourhood festival and the queue to get in went all the way back to St Peter’s Square.
Since those days, Blossoms have come a long, long way, and their live show has evolved and matured from five lads thrashing on their instruments to this well-oiled, hip-swaying, flares-wearing, chart-topping machine.
There’s even choreography now – how fancy!
A stand-out moment from the show is actually a song from their new, fifth studio album Gary, which is still barely eight weeks old.
A spoof recording of legendary Manchester indie club 42s rings out, then all five band members abandon their stations, slinging keytars and marching drums around their necks so that they can dance together in front of neon signs.
Blossoms have just done their second of five shows in Manchester, this time at the O2 Ritz. Credit: The Manc GroupBlossoms on stage at the O2 Ritz in Manchester. Credit: The Manc Group
Blossoms promised more disco with this album and they bloody meant it. It’s not just the flares and the blow-dries and the moustaches (though those do help) – it’s in the funk and groove that’s gradually crept into their music exponentially with each album release.
This is still indie rock but it’s the most danceable of its genre. Good luck keeping your shoulders from wiggling and jiggling in here. Good luck keeping that grin off your face.
And Gary is one of the most unexpectedly fun albums to be released in the last year – the fact they called it Gary, named after a giant fibreglass garden centre Gorilla, should’ve been our clue. It could border on silly were it not such a masterpiece.
It seems like the only thing Blossoms are trying to prove is that you can be wildly successful without taking yourself too seriously. They just seem like a group who want to have a good time and it’s totally infectious.
Case in point – when each band member is introduced, keyboardist Myles Kellock plays the riff of Satisfaction by Benny Benassi and The Biz. Unexpected.
Blossoms also clearly give a sh*t about their live shows and graft at it – I’ve seen these guys an awful lot and it’s because their tour dates are plentiful and consistently worth the ticket price.
This is definitely the biggest era of their career so far, but have they peaked? Not even close.