In case you didn’t already know, there’s a Manchester Facebook group dedicated to immortalising stupid comments overheard in the Northern Quarter, and it’s completely hilarious.
Whilst we don’t really have that much time for Facebook nowadays, this community group is so funny that it’s worth signing back in for – even if you’ve ditched the platform for good.
Chronicling all of the neighbourhood’s weird, wonderful, banal and basic goings-on, if you’ve ever found yourself wanting a birds-eye view of one of Manchester’s quirkiest neighbourhoods, well, this is it.
From candid pictures and videos of the eccentric characters who line its streets, to amusing observations and surreal conversational snippets, you’ll never see the district in the same light again.
Prepare yourself, though, because it’s about to get a little bit weird.
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From a guy who seemingly wanders the streets whispering and clutching a seagull late at night, to a man who pushes his cat in a pram and an owl that gets about perched on a guy’s shoulder, the Northern Quarter is forever full of surprises.
Here are some of our favourite quotes to date:
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‘Passing the Mini-Mart, and a young couple ask each other whether it is a cocktail bar.’ – Dan
‘Couple coming out of The Millstone: “My gosh that was like stepping into Bolton!”‘ – Jake
‘”Oooh is that the Trafford Centre?” / “No it’s Affleck’s Palace.”‘ – James
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‘”If you drop that pizza I’ll smack you in the face” – 12am outside Black Dog’ – Jessica
‘”I’d be more upset if Dianna was dead” / She is dead…”‘ – Jack-Cameron
“I take a lot of drugs yeah, but I’ve only lost my shoes once” – James
“If it bleeds we can ferment it” – Madeleine
A cat in a parm. / Image: Martin Maddox via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
‘On approach to The Millstone – “Let’s get wrecked in here before we head to The Ivy.” – Danny
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‘Guy on the phone near Shudehill: “Mate, what I’m trying to tell you is if you were in the ocean, you’d be king of the ocean.” / A few seconds later: “What I know about the king of the ocean is, the king of the ocean, would come out tonight.” – James
‘”I don’t like Aperol Spritz, it tastes like sadness.” – Thomas Street.’ – Jack
“She didn’t even know what a bottomless brunch was.” – Bella
‘Not overheard but I’ve just walked past a man carrying an owl like a baby.’ – Aims
‘”Man had a cat in a pram though” – Bouncer (photographic evidence of cat in pram available upon request)’ – Jimmy
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“I REALLY hope ‘Hipster’ is finally over mate” / Yeah sick of everyone looking like a vintage New York Docker whose trousers shrank in the wash” / Good news for now – but what will replace it?” / “Probably Pets With Pronouns” / “That’s a fucking mint Album Title right there mate” (Pair that looked like musicians – Idle Hands coffee shop) – Chris
Image: Chloe O’Toole via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
Image: Shaun Anthony via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
‘Two lads walking into Oldham Street from the Piccadilly Gardens end on a busy night: Lad 1: If this was a foreign city, and you were walking down here right now, what would you be thinking? Lad 2: Shithole Lad 1: Right!’ – Lucian
‘“I slept with someone with a vajazzle once” / “What was her name?” / “John” – Thomas St just now.’ –Alex
“You shag by the canal, say your goodbyes, then you fuck off” – Chloe
‘Was in Crazy pedros and some lad and his mate sat down and one of them went “bon appe seat”‘ – Matt
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Image: Rob Craven via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
The crisp poem. / Image: Rob Halfpenny via Overheard in the Northern Quarter
‘”Girl “Eurgh, he was just some fresh out of the womb child. 18 years old is too young” / Guy ”aren’t you only 20?” / Girl “yeah” / Guy “it hardly makes you a pedophile then”’ – Alex
‘”I hope someone puts something I say on that overheard in northern quarter group one day, that would be jokes.” Wish granted bro.’ – Jacob
Get Baked announces delay to first Manchester bakery – and ‘monumental’ changes
Daisy Jackson
Get Baked has shared another major update on its move to Manchester – and while things are delayed, the plans are looking bigger than ever.
The viral bakery, famed for its gigantic chocolate ‘Bertha’, was set to open in the Northern Quarter in November.
But they’ve now confirmed the whole process has been delayed until February or spring next year.
The good news is that it’ll be worth the wait – Get Baked is now taking over the unit next door on Stevenson Square too, so it’s an even bigger space for its incredible coffee, pie, and a slice of its legendary 24-layer chocolate cake.
The Leeds-founded brand then teased that they’re bringing ‘monumental changes to our existing offering’ – and ones that ‘nobody will have seen coming’.
Whatever those changes are, they’ll then be rolled out to Get Baked’s Headingley store too.
Summing up what to expect in Manchester, they wrote: “It’ll sort of be like if Greggs shagged Gail’s but it happened in America so there’s sprinkles and unhealthy sh*t just absolutely everywhere.”
And explaining the delay, they said: “I announced the opening of Manchester a few months ago now, and explained that we were hoping for a November opening.
“That obviously hasn’t happened, which is sad, and unfortunately if you miss November, December is a bit of a write off because of Christmas, and so is January because tradespeople like to go back to work half way through the f*cking month.
“In all honesty though, even February is looking unlikely.
“The delay started (oxymoron?) because the renovation of our bakery took a lot longer than planned — we have doubled the size of the space that we moved into earlier in the year, which has been a lot of work, and it’s still ongoing.
“We have already outgrown the newly doubled space, but luckily for us, the unit next door to the one we have just taken, is now up for lease.
Get Baked announces delay to first Manchester bakery – and ‘monumental’ changes
“So, we’re taking that space too, which will mean not only will I be sh*tting my pants at the thought of our overheads, but we’ll also be in a position where we can finally rollout stores the way we want to.”
Their statement also said: “In regard to the pending concept changes, I’ll leave you with this…
“In 2021 when I restarted Get Baked, I had a vision to create my own version of Greggs.
“Greggs is a truly wonderful situation, but it’s got too big for its boots in many ways hasn’t it.
“I’ve never been able to live out my fantasy of creating my version of Greggs, but half a million slices of Bruce (and Bertha) later, I’m nearly there. F*ck Greggs?”
You can keep up with the latest updates on Get Baked Manchester HERE.
An adorable new Jellycat store has just opened in Manchester
Daisy Jackson
The world’s most adorable brand has launched a big new opening in Manchester just in time for Christmas – welcome to the Jellycat General Store.
The viral stuffed toy brand has created a charming traditional corner shop experience, where every shelf is stocked with all your essentials in cuddly toy form.
From squishy toilet rolls to smiling eggs to bunches of flowers, and ranging from pint-sized keyrings to giant plushies, there’s a Jellycat for everyone here.
They’re even arranged much like a supermarket would be, with an aisle full of fruit and vegetable-shaped toys and another of sports equipment and games.
Though first famed for its soft bunny toys and its signature black cats, Jellycat has hugely diversified its range in recent years and now you can get plushies in every shape and size imaginable.
It’s created something of a cult following for the toys, which appeal to all ages.
With this new Manchester store within Selfridges, Jellycat has taking inspiration from nostalgic shopping experiences, down to building window displays of retro tins and adding a striped awning over the entrance.
There’s even a blue bench outside where you can take photos with a giant Jellycat character.
The new shop within Selfridges at the Trafford Centre follows successful openings in Birmingham and others across Europe.
Vicki Cain, store director at Selfridges Manchester Trafford, said: “We’re delighted to welcome the new Jellycat General Store to Selfridges Trafford.
“It’s a fun destination for customers to explore the Jellycat collection, with so many fabulous creations to choose from. Who could resist cuddling up to one of the giant Jellies?
“Our customers are huge fans of Jellycat, so this new opening is perfectly timed for those starting their Christmas shopping.”
The Jellycat General Store is open now at Selfridges at the Trafford Centre in Manchester.
Inside the Jellycat General Store in Manchester
The viral toilet roll Jellycat toyAisles at the Jellycat General Store are arranged by themeSeasonal Jellycat toys at the new Manchester shopJellycat’s signature black catsThe Jellycat toys at the new Manchester shop come in all shapes and sizesAn adorable gherkinJellycat flowersThe nostalgic Jellycat General Store in ManchesterCredit: The Manc Group
Georgina Pellant -
23rd September 2022 
