In case you hadn’t noticed, Erling Haaland has virtually secured this year’s golden boot in just six matches wearing sky blue and barring an unexpected injury, he shows no signs of slowing down.
The 22-year-old Norwegian has already bagged 10 goals and an assist in the league and a baker’s dozen in all competitions for Manchester City this season.
And we’re only in September.
Every type of goal – and plenty of them
So far, his highlights include scoring a game-winning brace against West Ham, as well as back-to-back hattricks against Palace and Forest. The latter was both a traditional perfect hattrick (left foot, right, header) and a ‘German perfect hattrick’ – all three goals scored uninterrupted by any other player.
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Oh, and he also scored each of them in consecutive halves across the two games if there’s a word for that – he essentially managed the most perfect pair of trios you’ll probably see for some time.
Even when doesn’t manage multiple goals, he produces moments of match-winning brilliance like this:
He’s going to score a lot of those finishes by the way.
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Most others would find it hard to even reach that ball and even if they could, very few are clinical, composed and creative enough to convert it into a goal.
The stats speak for themselves
With that in mind, if he’s already this prolific so early on in the season and he’s able to add even more improvised goals like this to his tally when most others wouldn’t even attempt, it’s fair to say that he’s going to pull even further ahead of his goalscoring rivals than he already is quite quickly.
To put things into perspective, even with an xG (expected goals) rating of 1.19 goals per every 90 -minutes of football, he is already exceeding his own stats, averaging an xG of 1.86 per 90 according to FotMob.
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Put even simpler, this means he’s scoring a goal around 48.5 minutes – that’s just in the Premier League alone.
If you extrapolate his numbers to take into account the three Champions League goals he’s already scored and presuming City make it to the final of the FA and Carabao Cup this year – and it looks very well they might – then the projected figures are verging on scary.
How many could Haaland theoretically score?
Were he to continue at this rate for as many games possible, he could theoretically end the season on a grand total of 102 goals – with 63 of those goals coming in the Premier League. That’s based on his average 80 or so minutes per game he’s currently on the pitch for – and it’s even more if he played the full 90 for the remaining 32 games.
Erling Haaland has virtually secured this year’s golden boot in just six matches / Credit: Man City (via Twitter)
Now, chances are he is going to a few games without a goal at some point (well, you’d hope so, for everyone else’s sake), but when you consider the sheer raft of talent and regular service from the rest of the City squad, it’s entirely possible he could break all kinds of records.
Essentially, whatever number he ends up finishing on is going to come down to whether Pep decides to rest him or whether or not he stays injury free, as he has been known to suffer a knock or two.
If left entirely up to him, we can only imagine what magic he produces.
Either way, whether you’re a City fan or not, it’s going to be genuinely riveting to see just how many goals he’ll score this season.
Tyson Fury calls Usyk and Joshua ‘s***houses’ and doubts AJ fight will happen
Danny Jones
Tyson Fury is at it again on social media, blasting both Anthony Joshua and Oleksandr Usyk after the latter suggested he was “afraid” of him.
While Fury is beginning preparations for his fight against AJ due to be held this December, Usyk attempted to rattle the Gypsy King’s cage in the meantime.
Speaking in an interview on his YouTube channel, the Ukrainian said, “Despite his toughness and how he is generally described, he is afraid. Yes, of me.” It didn’t take long for Tyson to respond in kind:
As you can see, the Wythenshawe-born heavyweight spends nearly a full minute shouting expletives, calling Usyk a “little s***house and a ‘little s***bag” before warning, “I’ll put my fist right through the side of you, you little sausage.”
The two have been interested in organising a fight to unify the WBC and IBF belts – held by Fury and Usyk, respectively – for some time now, with Tyson’s promoter Frank Warren insisting that he does believe it will happen at some point in the future.
Rubbishing the suggestion he is scared and dishing out some trash talk of his own, Fury then goes on to call out another “s***house”, as he puts it, labelling Joshua a “big bodybuilder” rather than a boxer and suggesting that he has been delaying signing the contract.
Despite Warren stating that terms would be agreed sometime soon, the long-awaited all-British bout could still be in doubt as we’ve already seen one potential fight disintegrate in the 11th hour.
AJ is coming off back-to-back defeats against Usyk, who he’d no doubt hoped to beat on his way to finally facing Fury. Nevertheless, the WBC champion believes he does want it at all, remarking: “You little sausage, you do not wanna fight, your manager’s a sausage.
The rant continues in a similar vein, with Fury adding: “I’ve never seen anything like yous, both a pack of s***houses.
“However, I will be fighting 3 December if this sausage does not sign the contract, which I don’t think he [will] because I don’t think he’s got the b****cks to, because he’s a s***bag.
It remains to be seen what kind of response Joshua will give and if the fight will finally be locked in. All we know is that it’ll be a big disappointment for fight fans if the match-up falls apart again.
Featured Image – Tyson Fury (via Twitter)
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Jack Grealish offers perfect response to Graeme Souness’ invitation for a pint
Danny Jones
Jack Grealish has offered the perfect response after former player turned pundit Graeme Souness said he’d like to go out for a pint with him.
Phoning into to talkSPORT radio to try and dismiss the suggestion that he has an agenda against the Manchester City star, Souness said he has “absolutely no” problem with Jack and that he only has his manager to impress.
Defending his stance on the player, he added that outside of football and his professional critique, he’d “love a night out with him”. It was this comment that saw the City no.10 come up with the perfect reply.
🤣🤣 let’s do it!! As long as I can bring Pogba as a +1
As you can see, Grealish jokingly responded by saying ‘let’s do it!! As long as I can bring Pogba as a +1″. Well played, Jack, well played indeed.
If you’ve paid any kind of attention to football five years or so, the 69-year-old former Liverpool player has long-held a reputation for homing in on select players with his criticism, none more so than former Manchester United midfielder Paul Pogba. Well, only Pogba, really.
Having taken umbrage with everything from his haircut and work rate to his style and perceived attitude on and off the pitch, the Scot’s seemingly unwavering problem with the Frenchman became one of the biggest football memes in history.
That being said, since Pogba left the Premier League it would seem the Brummy boy has become Souness latest target, labelling him a “precious” player and suggesting that he is “not a quick learner”.
Their spat is now getting so much publicity in fact that even prior to his social media quip, the 27-year-old even took time out of training at the latest England camp to address the situation, insisting: “I don’t know what problem to he’s got”.
Explaining his criticism during the broadcast, Souness went on to argue that while he doesn’t have a problem with the “cheeky chappy”, he does thinks he “technically fantastic”, he still believes he’s “entitled to an opinion”.
He went on to argue that pundits can’t be critical of “modern players” these days, even citing the reaction to his own feud with Pogba and arguing he was proved “100% right at the end of the day”.
Despite retaining his place in the England squad and opening his account in the league for City last weekend, Souness believes that there isn’t enough evidence to suggest that Grealish is among the “great” players in the Prem right now.
While he hasn’t been a regular starter for Pep’s side since arriving as the most expensive British signing of all-time, he is still one of the nation’s brightest talents and his international break would be a great opportunity to make a point.
Danny Jones -
16th September 2022 
