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A skateboarding lobster and a parallel parking hack – the weirdest things Mancs have witnessed living in Manchester

Daisy Jackson - 22nd April 2022

Manchester’s a brilliant city, but it can sometimes be a little on the, er, *eccentric* side.

From the infamous characters we all recognise a mile off when you see them walking (or indeed cycling) around town to the moments you catch out of the corner of your eye that no one believes really happened, there’s never a dull moment here.

Remember the guy who wore an actual snake as a face mask?

What about the giant pigeon spotted out on a stroll in Piccadilly Gardens?

Or the guy who flew a helicopter from Salford to Preston to pick up a beef sandwich?

Most recently, when we shared a video of a new Magnum billboard in Piccadilly Gardens, loads of you started telling us some of the strange sights you’ve seen in this notorious part of town.

So we asked The Manc readers what the weirdest things they’ve seen elsewhere in Greater Manchester are – and thousands responded.

Here are some of our favourites.

James told us he saw: “Pissed up people climbing that cycle statue at the end of Deansgate Locks. One of em made it and sat on it. Hadn’t a clue how.to get back down without falling, which he inevitably did …..poor sod”

Not sure how this one works – Keith said: “Was working in Gorton many years ago, went to a corner shop for a sandwich and was told there’s no bread so you will have to have toast. A true story.”

Jennifer gave us another animal tale, saying: “A man walking down brooklands road in brooklands carrying a falcon on his hand whilst whistling sweet nothings to it”

Diane said: “Saw a rat the size of a small cat running down canal street with half a burger in its mouth. We cheered on the little fellow lol.”

Le Anne had an even weirder animal sighting, writing: “A couple of lads walking down by the canal side in Castlefield, with a lobster on a skateboard – like it was completely normal. Proof attached”

There are a lot of stories involving the weather, naturally.

Melissa wrote: “I was having a smoke outside where I worked one morning, absolutely pissing down rain and a woman rode past on a bike in a bikini top, ear muffs and no knickers on. I saw a lot working there but that was one of the most bizarre!”

Amy posted: “This guy riding a scooter in the pissing down rain the other week… with two tesco bags over his feet to keep them dry.”

Far and away the most common weird sightings in Manchester relate to drunk people. There’s a surprise.

Helen recalled: “Me and my then boyfriend were coming home in the wee hours when we saw a chap, very drunk I’m presuming, sat in one of those pebble dashed bins they used to have back in the day. His backside was right inside it with him bent double and his arms and legs dangling down the side. I think he was drunk anyway…”

Nathan wrote: “Saw a guy at the cricket wearing one of those rubber horse masks. He had a pint but he was finding it really difficult to drink, with the horse mask and all. Eventually he managed to put the entire glass in the snout of the mask, and angle it enough that he could have a sip of it. But then he was stuck and he couldn’t get the glass back out because it was one of those useless flimsy plastic glasses, so his only option was to down his drink, which he did with the support of a roaring crowd around him.(A lot of it went down his shirt but let’s not let that take away from the magic of the moment)”

Laura found someone who probably had some deep regrets the next morning, telling us: “A man ‘swimming’ in a humongous pile of garbage at 3 in the morning in Deansgate. Actual front stroke and everything!”

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Paul witnessed a real Mr Bean-style crime in a pub once, writing: “I was once drinking in a pub, the landlord was away and the barmaid was in charge..two guys walked in wearing white coats and said they had come to collect the tv which the landlord had booked in for repair. They took the tv.. The landlord knew nothing about it..”

And then here are a couple more just completely mad moments from our brilliant city.

Gaynor said: “I once saw a man trying to park a car on deansgate in a very small space, It was a Nissan micra. In the end the doors opened 4 stocky men got out, picked the car up and plonked it into the space job done”

And finally, this, from Jen: “A group of foreign students were sat in St Peters Square with a guitar, when an angry man with one leg, hobbled over and without saying a word, hit the one playing the guitar with his crutch. All whilst an unconnected gentleman was sat playing ‘two become one’ on a recorder.”

You can browse more mad moments in our original post here.

Featured image: Facebook / Swinton People – Alison Jones