Gummy bears can be a top-tier sweet treat for all ages, but the bad reviews of these bulk packs on Amazon are enough to put anyone off.
The 1lb pack of Haribo Sugar Free Gummy Bears have some reviews that are so bad, they really do have to be seen to be believed and we’re honestly not exaggerating either.
They’re awful, but in the best way possible.
There’s so many hilariously bad reviews that are worth including here, but we’ve picked arguably the best (or should we say worst) one to share.
One very unsatisfied customer review reads: “I sit here writing this review at 4am from my porcelain throne, a fixture you will become all too familiar with if you chose to eat these cute little bears from the pits of hell.”
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“I had to eat a pound of these little b****rds after Man City must’ve thought they were playing American football the other week, and lost to a team of Arsenal scrubs. They were a bit chewy but overall, appeared to be nothing more than your average gummy bears. After about 2 hours with little more than some mild stomach cramps, feeling like one would expect from eating a pound of any candy, I began to wonder if I’d gotten some duds.”
“Like the slow build-up of a Martin Scorsese film however, those bears were waiting for their baptism scene to destroy my insides.”
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“It started with the cramping, very akin to doing 1,000 crunches and then being forced to hold the 1,001st crunch indefinitely. Then came the initial “run” which opened the proverbial flood gates. I’m over 30 and I’m beginning to wonder if these bears know that and want to send me back to the can for each year I’ve been on this earth to make me wonder why I’d ever been born.”
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It continues: “In between gastrointestinal bouts of pressure washing the inside of my toilet from my anus, I lay in bed feeling as if someone were to punch me in the stomach, I’d explode, turning the walls of my bedroom into a soiled Jackson Pollock rendition. To give you an idea, I’d spent $50 ordering a UFC pay-per-view only to willingly miss the last 2-3 fights on the main card because I didn’t want to stray too far from my master bathroom. Thankfully for me (and my marriage), fearing what might be coming, I convinced my wife to spend the evening at my sister-in-laws because trust me fellas, nothing will be gained from your significant other experiencing this with you.”
“I’m no longer in pain but am still having to make trips back to my master bath on a regular basis.”
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“Eat these if you dare but be forewarned, they are not to be trifled with unless you want your toilet to be a staging ground for repeat fecal rehearsals of “The Red Wedding” from Game of Thrones.”
Well then – what can we say?
We can only hope this is just a one-off bad batch of gummy bears, although we can’t be too sure.
What we can be sure of though is that these reviews some of the best worst reviews we’ve seen in a long time, so if you want to have a read of the rest of them, and trust us, you absolutely should do, then head on over to the Amazon listing here.
You’ll also be pleased to know that the gummy bears are no longer in-stock too.
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Eurovision costumes, props and instruments are being auctioned off – and it’s a mad collection
Daisy Jackson
Items from this year’s Eurovision Song Contest are being sold at auction this week, from iconic costumes to enormous props.
It means that fans of the massive event – this year held in Liverpool – will be able to snap up a permanent piece of Eurovision history.
Have you ever looked around your living room and thought ‘You know what this place really needs? Those giant purple hands that Kalush Orchestra danced on this year’?
Or ‘I hate this jumper. I wish a had a green one with a face on like those Daði Freyr Eurovision dancers’?
Or even ‘A set of fluffy pink and yellow heart-shaped cushions would really brighten the place up’?
Well now there’s an auction you might be interested in, with bids opening from just £5.
The original props, costumes, and even instruments are on sale now, until 11 June.
Kalush Orchestra’s hands are in the Eurovision auctionThe Daði Freyr jumpersCredit: BBC
You could be turning the actual lectern thing that Graham Norton and Hannah Waddingham stood behind for the results show into a cool bar, or decorating your pad with the drums used in Sam Ryder’s powerful performance.
The top bids currently, just a few days after the auction started, stand at £500 – that’s for the presenter’s lectern and for the Daði Freyr jumpers.
Someone else has bid a whopping £250 for a set of fluffy cushions.
There are more than 60 items available to buy, including parts of the set, which were designed by Julio Himede and unveiled by the King and Queen.
The BBC has reported that 20% of the money raised will go to two different charities, split between ACC Liverpool Foundation and BBC Media Action, with the remaining 80% going back to BBC Studios to fund programmes and services.
Sally Mills, head of sustainability at BBC Studios said: “Sustainability is at the heart of everything we do, both on and off screen.
“We have a responsibility to operate with as minimal an impact on the environment as possible, and are always looking for innovative ways in which to further engage audiences with our content, and extend the life of our sets and costumes.
“What better way to do this than to give fans the opportunity to own a piece of Eurovision history?”
Derbyshire woman sent floods of cards for 108th birthday after care home appeal
Emily Sergeant
A woman from Derbyshire has received floods of cards after her care home put out an appeal to celebrate her landmark birthday.
Ada Daniel is hitting a milestone that not many get to reach today – her 108th birthday.
Born in the picturesque Derbyshire village of Ambergate all the way back in 1915, and living in the nearby town of Ripley with her beloved pet Greyhounds for most of her life, Mrs Daniel had a successful career working at Belper Mill for 27 years before her retirement.
And also before going on to become, what Oldest in Britain has confirmed, is currently the 65th oldest person in the UK.
Mrs Daniel has lived at Codnor Park Care Home since 2015 now, and it was the staff at this Derbyshire care home who decided to put out an appeal on social media asking that kind members of the public send birthday cards.
They hoped to get 108 cards to celebrate her 108th birthday.
This isn’t the first time staff at the care home have put out a public appeal for cards, as they did the same for Mrs Daniel’s 105th birthday during lockdown back in 2020, and received that number and more.
And according to the home, this time has proved just as successful as the last, the BBC reports.
“Ada hasn’t got a lot of family left,” explained Kelly Goucher, who is the activity coordinator at Ashmere Derbyshire – the company that runs the care home.
Ada Daniel is celebrating her 108th birthday today / Credit: Supplied | Ashmere Derbyshire
“She never had any children, so she doesn’t have any grandchildren, so we just wanted to get her as many cards as possible… [and] I woke up to 135 messages the following morning of people wanting to send cards.”
Ms Goucher described Mrs Daniel as “a character” at the care home, and when asked what her secret to a long life was one time, she said it was “to have dogs, not kids.”
Emily Sergeant -
23rd July 2020 
