Kate Winslet has revealed the ‘awful, awful’ moment she was convinced she had defecated on stage at a leading Manchester theatre.
The Oscar-winning actress appeared on The Graham Norton Show and spilled all the details of the hilarious near-miss incident.
Kate explained that she was in a production of What the Butler Saw by Joe Orton at the Royal Exchange Theatre, which is right here in the heart of Manchester.
She told the audience, as well as enraptured fellow guests Sir Lenny Henry, Nadiya Hussain and Jack Whitehall, that she was ‘convinced I’ve totally sh*t myself’ live on stage.
Speaking on the show on Friday night, the Titanic star said: “Well I nearly did a poo on stage once.
“I’m just sitting here realising that you’re now going to make me tell that story.”
Kate Winslet. Credit: BBC, The Graham Norton ShowCredit: Royal Exchange Theatre
Of course, the entire audience and her fellow celebrity guests immediately start to egg her on.
Kate explains a part of the play where her character is asked to strip for a physical examination in a medical setting – and the logistics of the theatre’s stage that made the whole scenario so much worse.
“This theatre was in the round,” she said. “So little me, I go behind the curtain and I do what I’ve done for nights on end and I take everything off, and I’m behind this curtain sort of shaped like [a semi-circle] so all the people above me are looking straight down at poor little Kate.
“I have to lie on this bed and I would lie there really kind of uncomfortably and awkwardly, and I’m lying there and suddenly… “
At this point, she grips the couch and starts writhing, saying: “‘It’s happening, it’s happening, it’s happening. Oh my god I’m gonna sh*t myself.’
“And I’m lying on a white sheet, naked on a stage!
“I’m convinced I’ve totally sh*t myself. So I think ‘Well what am I gonna do, because in a minute I have to stand up, come out from behind the curtain, and look for all my clothes that he’s hidden in the plant pots, and I’ve done a f***ing poo! This is horrific!’
“So I start to sort of runkel the sheet, I try and skrunkle up this sheet as best I can, I do this kind of ninja flip move and I twist myself and I bind this sheet all around myself, and I’m still thinking ‘Ah, happening, happening, behind the curtain’ standing in front of an audience who can see me from every f***ing angle, and I’m absolutely just convinced that if I move my body, there’s going to be poo on the floor.
Kate Winslet on the Graham Norton Show. Credit: BBC
“This is the most awful, awful thing.
“Honestly, I practically slither off the stage, and I hide in a corner thinking ‘I’ve gotta check this sheet’.
“Ladies and gentleman, I had not actually done a poo. But the second I got into my dressing room and I ran into that bathroom – gunfire.”
You can watch the full clip here:
On YouTube, one person said: “Kate should get an award for that story. That’s why she so beloved.”
Another commented: “I knew Kate was talented but this is beyond hysterical.”
Someone else wrote: “Ladies and gentleman, witness the creation in real time of an all time classic Graham Norton Show story.”
Jason Manford has final word on ‘naughty’ rule that sparked unexpected Village Hotel experience
Danny Jones
Local comedian Jason Manford has shared “the last I’ll say on the matter between The People vs The Village Hotel”, after expressing his disappointment over a rule that saw him have a somewhat unexpected experience at one of their locations.
The Salford-born and Stockport-based stand-up was forced to share his room with another individual at The Village in Bournemouth after being told the hotel was fully booked.
Manford‘s room had essentially been resold, which led him to stay in a double with his friend and colleague; however, as explained in multiple videos, not everyone was fortunate enough to secure a last-minute solution.
Still, on the upside, at least they didn’t have to share a bed…
As detailed in the first of three posts seen above, Manford and co. arrived at the hotel late (as is typically the case with any touring comedian, especially a headliner) following his gig at the Bournemouth Pavilion Theatre on Sunday, 29 June.
The 44-year-old is currently on his ‘A Manford All Seasons’ tour, which saw a flurry of new dates added back in November, and got underway back in February.
Although he assured that the staff did their job and were “lovely” through the whole ordeal, he reiterated that he found the little-known rule “very naughty” and “not on”.
He also mentioned that a doctor who arrived shortly after them at the hotel reception, sadly, had to be turned away from the Bournemouth branch.
Manford went on to add that the hotel manager did apologise for the situation, but as he notes in the clips, the worry is that it could cause even bigger dilemmas if it were a wedding, someone with kids, “or a million different situations that you could have been in which are much more serious than [his].”
Essentially, the duo were just lucky they turned up when they did and said as much.
Despite noting that he’d heard of airlines opting for similar policies in the past, he confessed he’d never come across such a rule in more than “25 years of touring” as a comic.
Echoing his frustration, surprise and concern, musician Georgina Jackson said in the comments: “That is so bad! As a touring lone female musician who uses hotels a lot, what are we expected to do? But the fact is… they don’t really care…
“Thanks for highlighting it, as they might actually start caring when the bookings drop off! And, I imagine the hotel/town was busy with your audience!! How blinking ironic!!”
The hotel group has since asked the Salfordian funny man to take the very public complaints down, but Manford has refused despite them requesting quite “politely”, insisting that he believes more people need to know about obscure and largely unknown rules like these.
You can see the most recent and final statement on the whole Jason Manford-Village Hotel situation in full down below.
Featured Images — University of Salford (via Flickr)/Jason Manford (screenshot via Facebook)
TV & Showbiz
New immersive Race Across the World Experience comes to Manchester this summer
Thomas Melia
Hit BBC TV show Race Across the World is launching an interactive experience in Manchester this summer, inspired by the series.
After five original series and two celebrity spin-offs, it was only a matter of time before the huge TV show materialised into ‘Race Across the World: The Experience’.
Just like the real programme, you will be sent on a mission across the heart of the city centre where you will have to complete tasks and reach various checkpoints to be crowned champion.
The missions will see players visiting Manchester hotspots, lesser known locations, renowned pubs, and distinctive landmarks across three hours.
Teams will rely on our trusty Bee Network as they take a trip on our vibrant yellow trams and buses to get around the city as they make their way to each puzzle and activity.
At each puzzle destination, participants will complete a challenge to guide them to their next location, all of which is pre-planned and spread across a five kilometre city-wide voyage.
For Mancs and anyone further afield, ‘Race Across the World: The Experience’ offers a whole new way to explore Manchester and gives you the chance to see some of the city’s best hidden gems, even if you are on a time limit.
This sounds like a great idea for friends and family alike, and based off the amount of times we’ve had to sprint down to Platform 14 at Manchester Piccadilly, I think us Mancs were born for this challenge.
In true Race Across the World style, the team who manages to finish not just with the fastest time but with the most budget remaining too, will be the ultimate victor.
Cast of BBC’s Race Across the World / Credit: BBC / Studio Lambert
Tom Rymer, Founder of CityDays, said: “Following an outstanding debut month in London that has thrilled fans of the show, both old and new, we are bringing the Race Across The World Experience to Manchester.
“New puzzles, new characters, new decisions and new discoveries, all coming soon over three new thrilling legs. Manchester, are you ready for your race?”
A launch date for ‘Race Across the World: The Experience’ is yet to be released but eager entrants can sign up to the official waitlist and find out even more information HERE.
Daisy Jackson -
13th December 2022 
