Right, we don’t mean to alarm you all, but Max and Paddy might finally be coming back after nearly 20 years.In other entirely unrelated news, there is a god.
We only ever got one solitary season of Max and Paddy’s Road to Nowhere, but it only took six episodes for it to leave us with lasting memories of rolling on the floor laughing and quoting lines all these years later.
The Phoenix Nights spin-off went on to be not just a cult favourite but an iconic British sitcom that rivalled the show that spawned it, cementing both Peter Kay and Paddy McGuinness as even greater household names than they already were.
Cut to nearly two nearly full decades later and Paddy himself has teased that the hit Northern comedy might not be done after all. Battle stations, people — we’re on the campaign trail now.
Speaking to Capital Breakfast this week, McGuinness came on to the subject of Max and Paddy return, saying that “the interesting thing about Max and Paddy, and Phoenix Nights is now, we are kind of all of an age of the people we played back then.”
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He admitted that while they “do talk about it and what have you” and would love to see the full cast return someday, he just “can’t see it at the minute”.
However, he did go on to insist “never say never” and, more promisingly, that the comedy duo’s comeback, specifically, could very well be on the cards.
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“Like Max and Paddy, for instance, we wrote a couple of Christmas specials, and we’ve still got them”, says McGuinness. “We never got around to doing one for whatever reason back in the day. But we’ve actually got them.”
The 49-year-old went on to clarify that more than one script has already been written for some time, but they’ve just been kept on the backburner given that he is admittedly “inherently lazy” and likes “doing as little as possible”, it just never came to fruition.
“If you’re doing a scripted comedy show, it does take a long time. So to do something like [this], you have literally got to blank out 12 months of your life.
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“He [Kay] is on tour. I’ve got all kinds of stuff going on, and it’s just sort of going ‘right, let’s get together. Let’s get our diaries together. And let’s blank out for that time'”. We don’t know a single person that wouldn’t want to see a Max and Paddy return in some form.
While hosts Roman Kemp and Siân Welby urged people to get flooding them with texts and posting all over social media, the former Take Me Out presenter joked it “won’t make a blind bit of difference.” Come on, Paddy, don’t let us down now.
Police warn criminals ‘don’t bother’ attending Parklife after already making arrest
Daisy Jackson
Greater Manchester Police have said that criminals shouldn’t ‘bother’ coming to Parklife festival this weekend, after already making an arrest at the festival site.
Officers have been carrying out searches of people arriving on site this week – and have already arrested a 24-year-old man.
A quantity of pills and a knife were both recovered from the man, who has been arrested on suspicion of possession of Class A drugs and possession of a bladed article.
After the arrest, Superintendent Phil Spurgeon issued a statement to criminals, saying ‘don’t bother coming to Parklife’.
He said: “We have a really robust police and partnership community safety operation for the festival, and the arrest and seizure yesterday demonstrates the vigilance of security staff, our thorough search procedures and our commitment to keeping people safe.
Parklife Festival, and (right) the suspected Class A drugs seized this week by police. Credit: GMP
“Make no mistake, illegal items such as weapons and drugs can have fatal consequences. Our top priority this weekend is keeping people safe, and anyone caught trying to take such items into the festival will be robustly dealt with.
“I hope the genuine festival-goers are excited for the fantastic weekend ahead and I am confident the majority will enjoy the event responsibly and safely.”
Greater Manchester Police and Parklife security staff will be working closely together to intercept anyone travelling to the festival with criminal intentions.
The arrest on 8 June was thanks to the festival’s drug detection dogs.
University of Manchester hit by cyber attack with ‘data likely copied’ by unauthorised party
Emily Sergeant
The University of Manchester (UoM) has confirmed that it has today become “the victim of a cyber incident”.
In a formal statement addressing the situation, the city‘s flagship further education institution says some of its systems have been accessed by an “unauthorised party” and that data has “likely been copied” as a result of this.
The University’s in-house experts are said to be “working around the clock” to resolve the issue.
External support teams are also said to be working in collaboration with the University to understand what data has been accessed.
Patrick Hackett – Registrar, Secretary, and Chief Operating Officer at the University of Manchester – explained in a statement issued this morning: “Regrettably, I have to share with you the news that the University is the victim of a cyber incident, [as] it has been confirmed that some of our systems have been accessed by an unauthorised party and data have likely been copied.
“Our in-house experts and established expert external support are working around the clock to resolve this incident, and we are working to understand what data has been accessed”.
— The University of Manchester (@OfficialUoM) June 9, 2023
Mr Hackett said he understands the nature of the issue will “cause concern to members of our community”, and says the University is “very sorry for this”.
The University says it is also working with relevant authorities – including the Information Commissioner’s Office, the National Cyber Security Centre (NCSC), the National Crime Agency, and other regulatory bodies – to resolve the issue, and will provide information to those affected as soon as they are able to.
Students and staff are also be told to be vigilant to any suspicious phishing emails within the coming days – with the University’s IT Services team having published some relevant advice to refer to.
Danny Jones -
30th March 2023 
