The most talked about movie of the year, Cocaine Bear might be the best-worst idea for a film we’ve ever heard. Nevertheless, people have been obsessed with it ever since it was announced.
As it turns out, that obsession may have been warranted as, according to Rotten Tomatoes, Cocaine Bear might actually be… good?
Now, we know there are a lot of ‘good-bad’ films within this prevailing sci-fi horror-comedy genre that so many people like to spend their free time watching: Sharknado, Zombeavers, Sharktopus; Piranhaconda, Sand Sharks, Arachnoquake, Dinoshark—basically, there’s usually a shark involved.
However, Cocaine Bear in particular has managed to capture the imagination of millions and while many might have been preparing to like this film for all the wrong reasons, now the reviews are in it seems as though people are just generally enjoying it for the “hilarious”, “outrageous”, “ridiculous” romp that it is.
Cocaine Bear is gory, fun as hell, packed with hilarious grotesque kills and over-the-top characters, and at 90-ish minutes, it’s paced near perfectly and never overstays its welcome or overdoses on the joke.
As well as some pretty good scores from outlets across the board, Cocaine Bear not only managed to debut as ‘certified fresh’ on Rotten Tomatoes but after the first batch of user reviews and even half a dozen critics, it actually landed a perfect score of 100%.
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Obviously, this wasn’t going to last forever and this thing isn’t Citizen Kane; it soon slipped down to 88% and now, after a little over a week since its release, it has ultimately levelled out at 74% in terms of audience score and a 69% on the official Tomatometer — because of course it had to be that number.
With a rather impressive cast behind it, including Keri Russell, O’Shea Jackson Jr, Alden Ehrenreich and even Ray Liotta’s final performance before his tragic passing, not to mention comedy veteran Elizabeth Banks’ third feature film as director, there was plenty of added appeal to grab a ticket.
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But perhaps one of the main selling points behind this crazy cocaine-fuelled comedy is that it’s actually based on a true story. Sort of…
That’s right, this unbelievable script is loosely inspired by the bizarre 1985 story of a 175lb black bear that stumbled across a sweet-smelling suspicious package in the woods after a smuggler’s shipment was dropped mid-flight as his plane ultimately crashed into a mountain in North Carolina.
The pilot himself was found dead in someone’s back garden in Knoxville, Texas after presumably jumping from the plane but as for the 70 pounds of cocaine — estimated to be worth around $15 million — they landed in a forest in Georgia where the bear just so happened to come across the drug-filled duffel bag.
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After apparently consuming around $2m worth of the contents, the animal was dubbed ‘Pablo Eskobear’ and his unbelievable tale went on to become a Hollywood movie script.
Safe to say, people were sold on it the second they heard the words ‘cocaine’ and ‘bear’ in the same sentence.
Do I have to see Paddington 1 and 2 to understand Cocaine Bear?
Full disclosure, this legend is in the film but he’s still got a point.
So, the question is, how accurate is this utterly batsh*t story? Well, not very, but by all accounts, it is a hilarious, action-packed depiction of an extremely unlikely situation.
The actual story of poor Pablo was that after ingesting seriously excessive amounts of cocaine, he sadly overdosed shortly after and did not go on to take part in a murderous rampage like in the movie.
When you strip back the undeniably comedic element behind this utterly nonsensical film, it’s actually quite a sad story that ended up claiming the life of an innocent animal.
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In fact, Banks herself said that despite seeing the obvious potential in the script, she said she felt sorry for the bear who wound up as “collateral damage in the crazy war on drugs” and wanted to tell a more “uplifting version of that story”. For her, the bear isn’t the villain: he’s the hero (at least in spirit, anyway).
Regardless of the vague air of controversy behind it, Cocaine Bear has gone on to become a box office hit, grossing over $38m worldwide in its first week alone, all through sheerly embracing its own ridiculousness.
The film is doing so well in fact that it’s spawned its own line of highly collectable Funko POP! bobbleheads and there’s already talk of sequels and spin-offs, with Banks reportedly more than willing to take on what many people have labelled as a spiritual successor in the making, ‘Cocaine Shark‘.
Two words: yes and yes.
‘Cocaine Bear’ director Elizabeth Banks says she would be interested in directing ‘COCAINE SHARK’ based on the recent true story.
Chester Zoo welcomes The Traitors stars Claudia and Alan – but it’s not what you think
Lydia Mastrolonardo
No, Chester Zoo isn’t keeping actual Claudia Winkleman and Alan Carr in enclosures – everybody stand down.
The zoo is in fact welcoming its first pair of hooded vultures, to hopefully boost the critically endangered species, and they just so happen to be named after some of our favourite celebrities from The Traitors.
As famous as Alan Carr and Claudia Winkleman are, these two give them a run for their money, as the first of their kind to ever come to Chester Zoo – making them pretty big celebs in the animal kingdom.
The pair of vultures are currently nestling in to their new home, alongside their new white-headed vulture roommates, at the Heart of Africa aviary. It is here that conservationists are hoping the newly bonded pair will start a family, as part of a Europe-wide breeding programme, to help safeguard their species from extinction – no pressure or anything.
Bird Keeper Heather-Anne Pedley said: “Alan and Claudia came to us from the Horstmann Trust, a conservation breeding centre for vultures, where they are an established breeding pair. We named them after Traitors stars Alan Carr and Claudia Winkelman, because what better way to reflect how funny and engaging they are, than to name them after two national treasures?
“Nobody prepared me for how much I would fall in love with them, their antics and characters. They look like they’ve just put a hood up, and they have this beautiful blue ring around their eyes, like natural eyeliner.”
Alan and Claudia, Chester Zoo’s new vultures. Credit: Chester Zoo
Hooded vultures are distinctive with dark brown feathers, a buff ‘hood’ and a bald face and throat, with wingspans of up to 180cm. They are native to west, central and southern Africa, where they typically pick up their lunch by soaring over the land, looking for carcasses to feed upon as part of ‘nature’s clean-up crew.’
It’s not all gore though, they are very active, clever and interested in their environment. The couples are monogamous, will preen each other, gently touch each other’s bills and co-build nests – quite the romantics.
Heather-Anne added: “This pair are real love birds, and we are hopeful they’ll go on to breed. Any youngsters they go on to have will become part of a European conservation breeding programme, helping to create an insurance population for this incredibly rare species.
“In the wild, vultures help prevent zoonotic diseases – illnesses that can spread between species – because their stomach acid is so strong they can eat decaying meat that other animals would not be able to digest. This helps prevent the spread of diseases like anthrax and botulism into the soil.”
Despite their crucial role across various ecosystems, vulture numbers are declining and they are now sadly classified as critically endangered, according to the IUCN Red List of Endangered Species.
This decline is driven by mid-air collisions or accidental electrocution by scanning the ground for prey whilst perched on uninsulated power lines. These birds are also at risk of being poisoned or even hunted to facilitate an unsustainable demand for vulture body parts and eggs to be used in traditional medicine and rituals, while there is no scientific evidence to support this use.
We are really rooting these two and hope that they settle into their new home.
The BBC is looking for people to apply for the next series of The Traitors
Clementine Hall
The BBC is currently casting for the next series of The Traitors, and is looking for some deceptive Mancunians to take part.
It’s safe to say that The Traitors is pretty much a cultural phenomenon at this point.
Pretty much everyone and their dog is tuning in to watch The Celebrity Traitors on Thursday and Friday evenings, but this time it’s not about the celebs.
Producers describe The Traitors as a ‘game of trust and treachery’, and there’s always plenty of twists, turns, shocks, and surprises along the way – but do you reckon you’ve got what it takes to play?
If so, the BBC is currently casting for the next series of the popular show, and is calling on people in Greater Manchester and across the UK to apply.
Applications are currently open to players who are over 18 years of age and have the right to legally reside in the UK.
The first series of the smash-hit BBC reality competition show proved pretty popular when it premiered back in 2022, but the second series took things to a whole new level, and truly seemed to capture the attentions of the nation like no other – with millions of viewers tuning in to watch the three episodes each week.
But in case you haven’t seen it, The Traitors is, put simply, a competition series that’s built on strategy, suspicion, and deception, where a team of players are tasked with competing in a series of missions – with the more missions they complete successfully, the bigger the prize pot gets.
However, hidden among the players are the ‘Traitors’, who meet in secret and decide who to eliminate from their fellow players known as the ‘Faithfuls’.
The aim for the ‘Traitors’ is to stay undetected until the end, while the aim for the ‘Faithfuls’ is to banish all of the Traitors before the game ends.
Up for it? You have until 31 May 2027 to apply for the next series of The Traitors here.
Danny Jones -
5th March 2023 
