The most talked about movie of the year, Cocaine Bear might be the best-worst idea for a film we’ve ever heard. Nevertheless, people have been obsessed with it ever since it was announced.
As it turns out, that obsession may have been warranted as, according to Rotten Tomatoes, Cocaine Bear might actually be… good?
Now, we know there are a lot of ‘good-bad’ films within this prevailing sci-fi horror-comedy genre that so many people like to spend their free time watching: Sharknado, Zombeavers, Sharktopus; Piranhaconda, Sand Sharks, Arachnoquake, Dinoshark—basically, there’s usually a shark involved.
However, Cocaine Bear in particular has managed to capture the imagination of millions and while many might have been preparing to like this film for all the wrong reasons, now the reviews are in it seems as though people are just generally enjoying it for the “hilarious”, “outrageous”, “ridiculous” romp that it is.
Cocaine Bear is gory, fun as hell, packed with hilarious grotesque kills and over-the-top characters, and at 90-ish minutes, it’s paced near perfectly and never overstays its welcome or overdoses on the joke.
As well as some pretty good scores from outlets across the board, Cocaine Bear not only managed to debut as ‘certified fresh’ on Rotten Tomatoes but after the first batch of user reviews and even half a dozen critics, it actually landed a perfect score of 100%.
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Obviously, this wasn’t going to last forever and this thing isn’t Citizen Kane; it soon slipped down to 88% and now, after a little over a week since its release, it has ultimately levelled out at 74% in terms of audience score and a 69% on the official Tomatometer — because of course it had to be that number.
With a rather impressive cast behind it, including Keri Russell, O’Shea Jackson Jr, Alden Ehrenreich and even Ray Liotta’s final performance before his tragic passing, not to mention comedy veteran Elizabeth Banks’ third feature film as director, there was plenty of added appeal to grab a ticket.
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But perhaps one of the main selling points behind this crazy cocaine-fuelled comedy is that it’s actually based on a true story. Sort of…
That’s right, this unbelievable script is loosely inspired by the bizarre 1985 story of a 175lb black bear that stumbled across a sweet-smelling suspicious package in the woods after a smuggler’s shipment was dropped mid-flight as his plane ultimately crashed into a mountain in North Carolina.
The pilot himself was found dead in someone’s back garden in Knoxville, Texas after presumably jumping from the plane but as for the 70 pounds of cocaine — estimated to be worth around $15 million — they landed in a forest in Georgia where the bear just so happened to come across the drug-filled duffel bag.
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After apparently consuming around $2m worth of the contents, the animal was dubbed ‘Pablo Eskobear’ and his unbelievable tale went on to become a Hollywood movie script.
Safe to say, people were sold on it the second they heard the words ‘cocaine’ and ‘bear’ in the same sentence.
Do I have to see Paddington 1 and 2 to understand Cocaine Bear?
Full disclosure, this legend is in the film but he’s still got a point.
So, the question is, how accurate is this utterly batsh*t story? Well, not very, but by all accounts, it is a hilarious, action-packed depiction of an extremely unlikely situation.
The actual story of poor Pablo was that after ingesting seriously excessive amounts of cocaine, he sadly overdosed shortly after and did not go on to take part in a murderous rampage like in the movie.
When you strip back the undeniably comedic element behind this utterly nonsensical film, it’s actually quite a sad story that ended up claiming the life of an innocent animal.
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In fact, Banks herself said that despite seeing the obvious potential in the script, she said she felt sorry for the bear who wound up as “collateral damage in the crazy war on drugs” and wanted to tell a more “uplifting version of that story”. For her, the bear isn’t the villain: he’s the hero (at least in spirit, anyway).
Regardless of the vague air of controversy behind it, Cocaine Bear has gone on to become a box office hit, grossing over $38m worldwide in its first week alone, all through sheerly embracing its own ridiculousness.
The film is doing so well in fact that it’s spawned its own line of highly collectable Funko POP! bobbleheads and there’s already talk of sequels and spin-offs, with Banks reportedly more than willing to take on what many people have labelled as a spiritual successor in the making, ‘Cocaine Shark‘.
Two words: yes and yes.
‘Cocaine Bear’ director Elizabeth Banks says she would be interested in directing ‘COCAINE SHARK’ based on the recent true story.
85-year-old gran from Altrincham stars in new Adidas running advert
Danny Jones
Everyone’s favourite gran, Barbara Thackray, is back in the headlines and this time she isn’t just jogging and raising money, she’s featuring in Adidas’ brand new running advert.
The Altrincham-born and bred grandmother, who has become a local legend and inspiration across the UK with her incredible fitness and fundraising feats in recent years, is no stranger to being interviewed following her amazing efforts, but now she’s popped up in the new Adidas running ad too.
Barbara stars alongside the likes of Liverpool footballer Mo Salah, Qatari hurdler Mariam Farid and Egyptian runner Khadija Hegazy in the new TV and YouTube ad spot.
In the genuinely moving minute-long commercial, Barbara’s lovely little face pops up right at the end. Always save your best till last.
Actually quite stirring and inspiring, right?
Maybe it’s just us going soft in our old age (we never used to well up and interviews, promise), or maybe it’s because we know all the truly wonderful things she’s been doing for charity and her local community of late.
The Alty nan, who turned 85 earlier this month — the same day she broke her own PB in the annual Trafford 10k — has raised over £20,000 for St Ann’s Hospice in just a few short years, having been a champion of the organisation for more than 10 years amongst her sister’s illness and eventual passing.
She only started running when she turned 77 but now she runs around 12 miles every week.
The organisation’s Fundraising Manager, Lucy Leeming, said: “The awareness Barbara has raised across Greater Manchester for the importance and vitality of St Ann’s Hospice has undeniably helped raise funds and awareness for our charity.
“Her passion and dedication to towards our charity shines through in everything she does for us, we’re so grateful to have her support.”
As for Barbara herself, she’s still encouraging people of all ages to get into running; her only advice is “to begin gently and listen to your body.” No wonder the global sports brand chose her: she embodies everything the campaign is about.
To show this Alty gran some love and help her continue her incredible efforts, you can donate HERE.
Soccer AM cancelled after nearly 30 years on the air
Danny Jones
Sky Sports have reportedly made the decision to cancel British TV and sporting institution Soccer AM after nearly three decades on the air.
The iconic football and comedy talk show which first aired in 1995 and enjoyed huge popularity throughout the 90s and early 2000s is set to end at the end of this season (its 28th) with just 10 episodes left, as per an exclusive report by The Sun.
According to a source who revealed details to the outlet, Soccer AM will be axed at the end of the 2022/23 season due to low ratings and viewing figures, which have both gradually decreased over time — as has the running time, which went from 240 minutes to just 90 in more recent years.
The insider went on to claim that the decision has come as “a complete bombshell” to those involved with the programme, with “morale at an all-time low”.
Staff on the show were reportedly told of the cancellation on Tuesday, with their last episode airing on Saturday, 27 May, the day before the end of the Premier League season, at which point they will be made redundant.
Issuing a response to the news, a Sky Sports spokesperson said: “Soccer AM has played an important role in our coverage of football for the past three decades, and we continually adapt to the evolving needs of our customers.
“We now go into a period of consultation to discuss the proposed changes with our people. We are unable to provide more detail while these consultations are underway.”
As for current presenters John Fendley and former footballer Jimmy Bullard, who have been at the helm of the show since 2019, the two are said to have been left “fuming” by the decision. Figures from within Sky and around the footballing world have been paying tribute to the programme.
Just heard that @SoccerAM is finishing at the end of the season. I had 14 years of going through Premier League & @EFL clubs dressing rooms. Training with Clubs for features & basically having a laugh 😂 Fun part of my time at Sky 🤣 pic.twitter.com/7FbqUonB2f
Soccer Am ending at the end of the season 😔 I remember rushing downstairs as a kid to watch Lovejoy & Helen every week. The shows changed over the years but I still enjoy watching. Great memories and thankfully I’ve got my hat trick ball ⚽️ pic.twitter.com/fXIIwLtoWk
The show began with Russ Williams and long-time host Helen Chamberlain presenting back in 1995 before the latter was joined by veteran TV personality Tim Lovejoy just a couple of years later, with the two going on to become the most famous pairing in the show’s history.
As well as recurring comedic guest ‘Tubes’ (Peter Dale), some of the most famous guests you can think of made their way through Soccer AM‘s doors down the years, including the likes of Oasis, Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson, Kevin Hart, Dave Bautista, umpteenth footballers and countless others — you name ’em.
However, the show was not without its controversies and reflected a very different time and admittedly outdated part of British culture, to say the least.
Perhaps the most infamous serial segment of the show was its ‘Soccerette’ feature, which saw attractive young women walk into the studio and asked how old they were as men cheered “great age!”
The show obviously had to evolve over time but sadly its viewership continued to dwindle, no matter how much affection there was back in its heyday.
Speaking to Mirror Sport back in May 2022, leading figure Bullard admitted “it’s hard trying to refresh a show every single week with all the new material”, but that he still found it a privilege to be trusted with reinventing a show that is still “the start of a lot of people’s mornings on a Saturday.”
It was certainly far from perfect and pretty problematic at times, but it still played a huge role in the lives of many British people and young football fans’ formative years.