Nigel Slater has sent the internet into a right tizz after sharing a recipe for a sweet tart with quite a suggestive shape.
The 67-year-old food writer posted instructions for a custard and poached quince tart, alongside a picture of the pink pastry.
Nigel clearly spent a lot of time perfecting the recipe, but what he maybe didn’t do was think about his photography properly. Or, maybe he knew exactly what he was doing.
Because within minutes of sharing his quince custard tart recipe, the comment section was flooded with similar observations.
There’s no denying it – those soft folds of pink stewed fruit look an awful lot like a vulva…
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One person joked that the tart looked like it would have a ‘nice vulvatey texture’ while another said it was ‘Shameless clitbait’.
Nigel’s caption read: “Not something to hurry, but a pleasurable way to spend a quiet afternoon in the kitchen and worth every minute of your time.
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“The quinces need to be cooked until completely soft then left to cool in their syrup which is then boiled down for the glaze. You could make them with apples should quinces prove evasive.”
But his followers were so distracted by the NSFW image that they couldn’t resist bombarding him with jokes.
Nigel Slater’s accidentally rude tart recipe. Credit: Instagram
One person wrote: “Is it my dirty mind or….*checks comments* nope, we are all filth bags together.”
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Another said: “Broke my neck running to the comments.”
Someone else posted: “Nige, I’m going to put it down to your being a sweet gay man that you have no idea what you’ve posted. Merry Christmas.”
And someone else passed on season’s greetings, saying: “Merry Clitmas, one and all.”
Another festive joker said: “Feliz Fannydad! (Thanks for making my crimbz, Nigel!)”
And on X, formerly known as Twitter, one user shared: “Nigella: ‘No one does sexy Christmas like me.’ Nigel: ‘See my beer? Will you hold it?'”
Nigel Slater has since posted a follow-up to the erotic quince tart, writing: “Gracious me, thank you for all your likes and comments on my last post. Some absolute gems there.
“A very low-key Christmas here this year, so here is a picture of my tree in 2022 (probably my favourite ever) to wish you a very, very happy and peaceful Christmas and to say a heartfelt thank you to everyone for following and for all your messages over the year.
Disney On Ice is bringing its ‘Find Your Hero’ tour to Manchester this Christmas
Emily Sergeant
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Disney On Ice is returning to Manchester with a brand-new magical adventure for the whole family this festive season.
I know June has only just begun and that officially means summer is here, but do you fancy just casting your minds forward to Christmas for a second?
That’s because Disney On Ice has announced today that it’ll be heading out on a tour of the UK once the festive season rolls around, and of course, the tour’ll be making a stop here in Manchester.
Audiences will get to discover what it truly means to be a hero, as Mickey and Minnie Mouse and all their friends from the Disney Kingdom come together to take families on a journey of unforgettable moments as they bring timeless tales to life on ice.
The production will travel throughout the UK, visiting places like Birmingham, Nottingham, Newcastle, Aberdeen, and Belfast, all before arriving at Manchester’s AO Arena.
This is your chance to re-live famous Disney stories with all of your favourite characters, alongside the magic of classic Disney songs and world-class ice skating.
Disney On Ice is bringing its ‘Find Your Hero’ tour to Manchester this Christmas / Credit: Supplied
The talented Disney On Ice cast rehearse for more than 550 hours to perfect each performance and encapsulate the characters, while a team of choreographers, and set and costume designers, create more than 200 props and more than 200 different costumes.
Encanto, Moana, Frozen, The Little Mermaid, Sleeping Beauty, and Tangled are just some of the legendary Disney tales you can see reimagined when Disney On Icepresents Find Your Hero arrives in Manchester this December.
Disney On Ice presents Find Your Hero 2025/26 tour dates
bp pulse LIVE, Birmingham: 29 October – 9 November 2025
Motorpoint Arena, Nottingham: 12 – 16 November 2025
Utilita Arena, Newcastle: 19 – 23 November 2025
P&J Live, Aberdeen: 27 – 30 November 2025
SSE Arena, Belfast: 5 – 7 December 2025
AO Arena, Manchester: 10 – 14 December 2025
Utilita Arena, Sheffield: 17 – 21 December 2025
O2 Arena, London: 26 December 2025 – 4 January 2026
The magical production is arriving at the AO Arena this December / Credit: Supplied
The production brings beloved characters to life through cutting-edge figure skating, eye-catching costumes, and stunning set designs, with innovative lighting and thrilling special effects, making it an experience the whole family will treasure forever.
Disney On Icepresents Find Your Hero arrives at Manchester’s AO Arena from 10-14 December 2025, and tickets go on Three+ presale on Monday 9 June and AO Arena presale on Thursday 12 June, both at 9am.
All before they then go on general sale next Friday 13 June, again at 9am.
London attraction The Curling Club is now expanding into Manchester
Thomas Melia
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Well-reviewed winter attraction The Curling Club, which has already made a name for itself in London, is now making its way to Manchester.
Set to open in Manchester’s world-class skyscraper district, New Jackson, The Curling Club is keeping its stay short and sweet, with a three-month residency here in the city centre.
Curling Club will signal in the mid-winter season as it runs from late November right through until the end of February, giving you a lengthy period of time to sweep ’til your heart’s content.
This sports-themed pop-up opened in the capital last year, offering guests a wintery escape packed with food and drink choices, accommodating up to 600 people at a time, right next to The Shard.
The Curling Club is set to open in Manchester this November until February.Imagine a pint or two in this curling haven in Manchester this year.Credit: Justin De Souza
Now, Manchester’s latest activity bar destination is bringing its charm and competitiveness to Manchester for the first time ever, hoping to emulate the success of its capital predecessor while encouraging people to pick up the sport.
Just like the original London location, their Manc site will feature the iconic custom-built lanes and sustainably-made granite stones, which are set to improve your precision and control – fancy that.
We’re sure will still somehow manage to be the worst players in the room at any given time.
If that wasn’t enough curling expertise for you, there will also be on-site coaches helping guests perfect their technique and providing some top-notch advice.
There will even be an exclusive appearance from Olympic gold medallist Eve Muirhead and Team GB’s ‘Chef de Mission’, Mark England, who will be hosting select events across the two cities.
Manchester can expect a similar curling set-up this year.The glitter-ball dancers ready and waiting for this wintertime.Credit: Justin De Souza
New Jackson will be the ultimate backdrop for this innovative winter experience as the venue will be curating seasonal cocktails as well as being home to live DJS, glitter-ball dancers and some seriously good food.
You had us at booze and scran.
Keep this seasonal site in mind as they’re already marking themselves as a destination for work parties, events, group outings and Christmas party celebrations.
Trevor Bowers, Chairman of The Curling Club, said of the impending opening: “With this expansion and other plans, we’re accelerating our national rollout – all while staying focused on delivering exceptional, high-quality experiences for both guests and corporate clients during the winter season.”
Daisy Jackson -
18th December 2023 
