The art world can be a strange place. So can social media sites like TikTok. What do you get when you combine those two with one of the most memeable footballers? Unhinged chaos, it would seem.
Artist ‘Rory Paints‘ has been gradually developing a cult following online, in no small part down to his absolutely nightmarish but undeniably hilarious Erling Haaland portraits.
While Rory is obviously a super-talented painter judging by his Instagram, achieving some impressive results when it comes to realism and style, he clearly has a primary penchant for comedy and memes, specifically. That’s where things get weird.
With that in mind, the online artist challenged himself to paint a portrait of Haaland every day “until he puts a restraining order” on him. As you do.
As you can see, not only are the results absolutely terrifying, picking some of the most unflattering expressions and angles of the eccentric Manchester City striker that have ever been perceived, but they are also undeniably hilarious.
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Posting his latest video on Sunday, 7 November, Rory showcased day 13 of his bizarre self-imposed challenge, highlighting every one of his cursed Haaland portraits thus far. Utterly confounding, every single one of them.
From making his entire face fill the canvas and giving him beaded braids to turning him into the handsome Squidward meme or Thomas the Tank Engine, he has managed to turn the Norwegian’s already distinct appearance into the stuff of nightmares.
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We have no idea how long Rory intends to keep up his undoubtedly one-of-a-kind Erling Haaland portraits but we sincerely hope he does. A laugh a day.
Five Manchester artists we’ve been listening to this month | October 2024
Danny Jones
Hello Manchester, hope you’ve been doing well and finding lots of great new music; even if not, you’ve come to the right place because it’s time once again to dive into five bands and artists from in and around Manchester that we’ve been listening to of late.
We’re not sure what it is necessarily – perhaps all the smaller to mid-level British bands that we loved for many years announcing their break-ups recently – but we’ve been soaking ourselves in pretty much not but groups and mainly infectious indie riffs for the past 31 days.
That being said, we do have a surprise or two on the list this time around and, more importantly, everyone that we’ve spotlighted is obviously brilliant because we’d never lead you astray.
Anyway, enough faffing about, time for you to find some new Manchester artists and music to get stuck into – go right ahead.
Five Manchester bands you should check out this month
First up on our list of five Manchester bands we’ve been listening to throughout October is the still very new and already very good, The Guest List: four mates making very good indie rock with a more old-school vibe that’s almost reminiscent of the early 2000s and a general swagger way beyond their years.
Only formed back in 2021 and are obviously still young lads, there’s already an impressive understanding of building both mature and memorable melodies, which we can only assume has come from soaking up the right influences growing up. They did go viral for a great cover of ‘505’ by Arctic Monkeys too.
They’ve only released a small selection of music so far, meaning you should definitely catch up with all their discography whilst it’s still easy, but we’d pick out ‘161’ as a great example of that impressively reminiscent sound and lyricism, so is ‘Won’t You Leave Me Alone’ and we just love the guitar on ‘Canada’.
2. Larkins
Next up for this month is Larkins and while they have been around for a good long while now, with just a couple of EPs and one admittedly short and sweet debut album between them, they still feel like our little secret somehow.
They’re categorically not by the way: these guys gained some loyal local fans from their humble beginnings up in Glossop all the way back in 2015, unbelievably, and as their Manchester following grew, along with the number of gigs and festival slots,
‘Hit and Run’ – the first song they ever released – remains an effortless indie banger designed to get the crowd jumping and an older track we also still love is ‘Sugar Sweet’, but TV Dream is still their biggest song for a reason. You can start wherever you want with these guys, to be honest, it’s all pretty good.
We also enjoy this slower, synthy sing-a-long, not least because of where it’s filmed…
3. The Apex Singers
In at the middle mark, we’ve got undoubtedly the most talented vocalists we’ve ever put on this list simply due to the level of classical training, range and the sheer amount of people pulling together to make such a fulsome, orchestral sound. They even do workshops but it must be hard to teach this…
A Manchester-based vocal ensemble made of eight incredible voices, the name Apex Singers couldn’t be a more fitting moniker. They can go from soothing and uplifting – like you’re listening to the Elven songs from a medieval fantasy film – to haunting, hallow and utterly tear-jerking times.
It genuinely floors us at times that humans can sound this beautiful. Their recent original song ‘The Mermaid Wife’ is a stunning production and a special shout-out to ‘The Booley House’ which actually started out life as a fiddle solo, but you’ll probably best recognise this old Irish song made famous by Hozier not too long ago.
Special shout-out to The Manc‘s very own Oli for this recommendation.
4. Rolla
The second to last band on our list of Manchester artists we recommend you get stuck into is Rolla, and we’re going from soft to hard and in your face with this one. Do the bucket hats, mod haircuts and shades give off quintessentially Northern rock and roll? Yes. Is that kind of the point? Absolutely.
Make no mistake, this isn’t just another band merely trying to imitate the Britpop sound that was mastered here in 0161 enough now, they’re the real f***ing deal if you ask. Rather ironically rolling Oasis, Stone Roses, The Verve, Shed Seven and more all into one, it’s pretty much a Mancs wet dream.
There are so many tracks that give Liam Gallagher leaning into the mic if that’s what you’re after, but ‘No Violence’ was the first track we heard, ‘When Life’s Thunder Striking’ is the one we fell in love with and we’re quite literally addicted to their newest single ‘We Owe You Nothing’. They’re also doing their bit to help out Salford Lads Club too.
Last but not least, we’re swinging back in the direction of no-nonsense indie yet again with Ventrelles, though there’s also a throwback element sonically here too. This Manchester quartet are still pretty green as well but they seem to have found the niche they’re going for.
Self-described as everything from ‘ScallyGaze/Council Soul/Highrise Psychedelia’ to ‘Fleece Pop’, you can call their so-called sub-genre whatever you want but you’ll definitely get dripping vocals that hark back to the Roses, as well as some Echo and the Bunnymen-esque effects and guitar patterns at times.
‘County Lines’, ‘A Symphony of Sorts’ and their 2023 single ‘Happenstance’ almost reminded us a little of Hard-Fi in spots; we’re not sure whether this was just a moment in time for the band but delays, pedals and shimmery guitars or not, we just can’t wait for them to drop some more tunes.
They also credit some of their sound to Liverpool band Pale Fountains and other contemporaries from the area.
And there’s your lot, five more Manchester artists for you to familiarise yourself with and we hope you get at least some variety from us this month even despite the fact we’re still mourning the likes of Sundara Karma, Jaws, The Native and more.
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Still, it looks like we’re getting back everyone from The Maccabees and Doves to even the Scissor Sisters, so it’s not all bad and we still love stumbling across new bands and artists more than anything.
As always, we encourage you to go back and check out last month’s list and all the other for that matter, and we’ll catch you next time!
Giselle, one of the greatest romantic ballets, has landed in Manchester and it’s a must-see
Eva Claricoates
When the English National Ballet is in Manchester, it’s an opportunity you shouldn’t let slip by, and is almost guaranteed to be one of the most stunning performances to grace the stage– Giselle at the Palace Theatre certainly was.
Giselle tells the story of a young peasant girl, who falls in love with Albrecht, a duke, who pretends to be a peasant in order to seduce the show’s namesake.
Albrecht is not only hiding his status but also an engagement to another. When Giselle finds out about his deception, she descends into madness and dies from a broken heart.
Giselle is summoned from the dead by spirits, the Wilis, all abandoned and betrayed before their wedding day. The Wilis take their revenge by dancing men to death, and Giselle must decide whether her love for Albrecht is too strong to sentence him to the same fate.
Credit: The Manc Group
Giselle tells a story of grief, heartbreak, and love, and how a true heart always avails. Hauntingly beautiful and romantic, Mary Skeaping’s production had been tenderly revived from its original performance, and it’s clear to see why the performance received five-star reviews earlier this year.
The entire production was captivating and dramatic, leaving the audience gasping, laughing and firmly glued to their seats. Adolphe Adam’s score is performed live by the English National Ballet Philharmonic nestled beneath the stage, which compliments the performance beautifully and skilfully.
Perhaps the most mesmerising point of the performance was the Wilis appearing in the forest at the beginning of act two, as they formed perfectly symmetrical formations, and appeared to almost float across the stage.
It served as a great medium for exploring themes of the supernatural exquisitely, providing truly stunning imagery to the audience.
Giselle uses mime to convey its storyline to the audience, and even if you are a first-time ballet-goer, it’s an easy-to-follow, modern performance which can be enjoyed by all audiences. If you’re so inclined, you can even get involved in a dedicated ballet masterclass.
Join our Creative Learning team and English National Ballet on Saturday 2 November for an exclusive ballet masterclass at the Palace Theatre! 🩰
This workshop is suitable for ages 11-17 with a keen interest in dance ranging up to intermediate levels.
Danny Jones -
7th November 2022 
