Gummy bears can be a top-tier sweet treat for all ages, but the bad reviews of these bulk packs on Amazon are enough to put anyone off.
The 1lb pack of Haribo Sugar Free Gummy Bears have some reviews that are so bad, they really do have to be seen to be believed and we’re honestly not exaggerating either.
They’re awful, but in the best way possible.
There’s so many hilariously bad reviews that are worth including here, but we’ve picked arguably the best (or should we say worst) one to share.
One very unsatisfied customer review reads: “I sit here writing this review at 4am from my porcelain throne, a fixture you will become all too familiar with if you chose to eat these cute little bears from the pits of hell.”
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“I had to eat a pound of these little b****rds after Man City must’ve thought they were playing American football the other week, and lost to a team of Arsenal scrubs. They were a bit chewy but overall, appeared to be nothing more than your average gummy bears. After about 2 hours with little more than some mild stomach cramps, feeling like one would expect from eating a pound of any candy, I began to wonder if I’d gotten some duds.”
“Like the slow build-up of a Martin Scorsese film however, those bears were waiting for their baptism scene to destroy my insides.”
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“It started with the cramping, very akin to doing 1,000 crunches and then being forced to hold the 1,001st crunch indefinitely. Then came the initial “run” which opened the proverbial flood gates. I’m over 30 and I’m beginning to wonder if these bears know that and want to send me back to the can for each year I’ve been on this earth to make me wonder why I’d ever been born.”
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It continues: “In between gastrointestinal bouts of pressure washing the inside of my toilet from my anus, I lay in bed feeling as if someone were to punch me in the stomach, I’d explode, turning the walls of my bedroom into a soiled Jackson Pollock rendition. To give you an idea, I’d spent $50 ordering a UFC pay-per-view only to willingly miss the last 2-3 fights on the main card because I didn’t want to stray too far from my master bathroom. Thankfully for me (and my marriage), fearing what might be coming, I convinced my wife to spend the evening at my sister-in-laws because trust me fellas, nothing will be gained from your significant other experiencing this with you.”
“I’m no longer in pain but am still having to make trips back to my master bath on a regular basis.”
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“Eat these if you dare but be forewarned, they are not to be trifled with unless you want your toilet to be a staging ground for repeat fecal rehearsals of “The Red Wedding” from Game of Thrones.”
Well then – what can we say?
We can only hope this is just a one-off bad batch of gummy bears, although we can’t be too sure.
What we can be sure of though is that these reviews some of the best worst reviews we’ve seen in a long time, so if you want to have a read of the rest of them, and trust us, you absolutely should do, then head on over to the Amazon listing here.
You’ll also be pleased to know that the gummy bears are no longer in-stock too.
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Tommy Fury vs Darren Till press conference descends into foul-mouthed chaos
Danny Jones
The first press conference ahead of Tommy Fury vs Darren Till was held on Tuesday evening and it didn’t take long for the whole thing to descend into absolute bedlam.
Having only been confirmed on Sunday, Fury vs Till will be a homecoming bout for the Wythenshawe-born fighter who is set to headline the first-ever boxing match at Manchester’s Co-op Live arena.
With the date set for 18 January, the pre-fight build-up and media frenzy are growing fast and things have already come to ahead in just the first meeting between the two fighters in London this week.
Clearly sharing plenty of bad blood already, while Tommy and Till were engaging in the usual fighting talk, the family patriarch, John Fury, decided to interject and it was at this point that things boiled over.
‼️ Tommy Fury vs Darren Till press conference descends into chaos as Till tells John Fury: "Shut up, you haven't been seen since Oleksandr Usyk battered Tyson."
As you can see, amidst the various insults being thrown around regarding intelligence, boxing ability, Tommy’s older brother Tyson being “battered by [Oleksandr] Usyk”, ‘Big John’ then launches a bottle of water across the table at Till, sparking a hot-tempered on-stage skirmish.
The lengthy exchange features as many expletives as you could imagine, with 31-year-old Darren Till also threatening that he will “bladder” both Tommy and his more established heavyweight sibling Tyson, labelling the entire Fury family “shithouses” as they walk out of the London press conference.
A mixed martial artist by trade who has competed at both welterweight and middleweight in the UFC, Till assured that even if the boxing match isn’t going his way on the night, he will kick [him] square in [the] face”, adding that he’s a “proper fighter” and that Tommy, on the other hand, has no power.
YouTube turned musician and occasional boxer, KSI – the founder of the Misfits promotion who is putting on the event and who Fury beat back in October last year – can also be heard whooping from centre stage and shouting, “Get your tickets!”
Even after the mini-brawl is separated, the foul-mouthed back and forth continues for some time. You can see another angle here:
Press conference aftermath 🤯@darrentill2 was going IN on the Fury’s 😳
This isn’t the first time things have boiled over at a Fury press conference; in fact, it’s not even the first time John Fury, 59, has found himself in the very eye of the storm.
Meanwhile, the youngest Fury son is preparing first his first fight in over a year, having nearly joined this year’s I’m a Celeb lineup instead.
Tickets for the now highly-anticipated boxing match at Co-op Live, just the second combat sports event to have been held at the arena, are on sale now – you can grab yours HERE. It’s going to be a feisty one.
Festive Grinch-themed cafes to pop up inside Greater Manchester Primark stores
Emily Sergeant
Festive Grinch-themed cafes are popping up inside two of Primark’s biggest Greater Manchester stores in the run-up to Christmas.
As the temperatures turn colder by the day, the nights draw in, and the most wonderful time of the year nears closer and closer, it won’t be long before it’s time to snuggle up in our comfies and pop on the first Christmas film of the year – and for some of us, there’s a good chance that first film of choice will be The Grinch.
Whether you prefer the 2000 fantasy comedy starring Jim Carey, or the 2018 animated reboot with Benedict Cumberbatch, it’s undoubtedly a real family favourite.
To celebrate everyone’s favourite grumpy green grouch, Primark has teamed up with Dr. Seuss once again on a Grinch-tastic collaboration.
Festive Grinch-themed cafes have popped up inside Greater Manchester Primark stores / Credit: Supplied
Shoppers can now head to their nearest Primark store to find the largest-ever Grinch collection, with something for the whole family, as well as great gifting options said to be “ideal for getting into the anti-Christmas spirit”.
There’s Grinch pyjamas and slippers for both adults and kids, a Grinch ‘Onesie’ that’s sure to make people green with envy, Grinch drinks cups and mugs, a selection of loungewear and Christmas jumpers for festive dressing, and so much more, as well as whole host of Grinch-inspired outfits and toys for your four-legged friends too.
As part of Primark’s aim to offer affordable choices for everyone, prices for the Grinch collection start at just £1 for accessories, and go up to £24 for adult clothing.
If the return of the Grinch collection wasn’t exciting enough as it is, the all-new Grinch cafes – which are popping up in Primark on Market Street in Manchester city centre, as well as Primark in Trafford Palazzo – are bound to be hit with fans of the furry character.
There’s everything from green waffles and themed milkshakes, to festive toasties, hot drinks, and more on the menu.
With Greater Manchester Grinch cafes set to be open until the end of December, Sarah Jackson – who is the Director of Licensing at Primark, said: “We’re so excited to roll out our amazing cafe experience across a number of our UK locations, bringing a sprinkle of mischief to our customers this festive season.
“Whether you’re stopping in for a sweet treat or stocking up on pyjamas and gifts for the whole family, we have everything you need to make it a truly unforgettable Grinch-mas.”
Emily Sergeant -
23rd July 2020 
